Justin kicking ass in life

2003-04-22T19:06:00.000-07:00

I have decided to stop production of this blogger. Good bye.

2003-04-21T19:26:00.000-07:00

i know i should be studying now, but i figure i post this in the mean time. I'll study hard, and I will pass my tests. My determination to go to Japan and see my family and Fumie again is what drives me to succeed.

2003-04-18T11:06:00.000-07:00

Ah shucks. I have a computer literacy test Tuesday, and a Biology test the following day. Sucks a big one.

2003-04-16T15:48:00.000-07:00

An apology to Canadians

I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him.
Justin's thoughts: Yeah, and I suppose Canada has better schoools that offer better graduate programs than Harvard and I suppose you only have a jr. high education. And he's president otherwise he wouldn't have been elected. And the people don't really elect Bush at all directly, the electoral college does. Shows what Canadians know about this shit.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own.
Justin's thoughts: Hey, as long as you get money

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
Justin's thoughts: I'm sorry that your Canadian hero Bret Hart got slapped around by Shawn Michaels (who happens to be from Bush's home state of Texas) and got screwed infront of you lazy Canadians.

I'm sorry we burnt down your white house during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
Justin's Thoughts: Thanks. And we're sorry that you were still a Britsh colony after the war was over and required so much of their assistance to remain under their sway.

I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we Feel your Pain.
Justin's thoughts: What the hell? And drink moose piss instead?

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
Justin's thoughts: You're absolutely correct. We did take far too long to get involved. I suppose it's lost on you that we were the major (and nearly only) source of war material for the allies after only a few months of fighting and LONG before we were "formally" part of the war. We chose sides immediately and never waffled a bit...and we never asked you to pay us back for the vast amount of equipment, food and services we contributed under the "Lend-Lease" program. We're such bastards! I guess this time we should listen to our own hearts instead of following the UN like we did the wishes of the League of Nations back then.

Then again, your relatives the French when they asked for proof, it came to them under a German flag

Anyways, I have respect for Canadians. But these Canadians live in Florida. I can't say I blame them for living that far away from their home country.

2003-04-15T20:50:00.000-07:00

My mom still wants me to try to get those 10 points back. Worse, she wants me to use my learning disability as an excuse. To be honest, that's against my character to do that. Then again, that excuse to use forced by my mother was what got me into ASU in the first place. Still, I guess I gotta sell out sometime to get somewhere. Then again, I never used that bullshit to get me to win the Japan-U.S. Senate Scholarship.

Anyway, I tend to still get distracted from what I want and need to do. I badly wanted to decide to go to Japan this summer during my spring break, but couldn't it just pissed me off. Hey, I know life is not fair, but I still have the right to decide my life.

2003-04-14T18:38:00.000-07:00

Fumie, I need you more than ever. I decided to put the purikura pictures you gave me all over my wallet. In the cover in front of my license. Now you will be with me everywhere I go. I'm sorry I may not be able to come this summer again. If I had to kill myself to see you again, I would. I hope to study at Toudai or at Hiroshima Shudo or Hiroshima City University next year. You have no idea how much I need you.

2003-04-05T08:34:00.000-08:00

Dear Fumie-Chan,

I've been very upset latley. My biology proffesor is stuipd. Beacuse I made
a mistake writing my ID number, I lost 10 points. That his really stupid.
There are also other reasons why I am upset. I've been betrayed by everybody.
I could never do such a thing to you. That is a promise. If I keep failing,
I probably wont came to Japan. I realy wanted to give you a pretty diamond
ring. I'm tired of not being able to come to Japan. I really want to see
you and be with you. I don't want to cry anymore. But you're the only one
that can help me.

If you can't email me, I will understand. But I still would like you to
help me. I can't contront my problems alone. If you cheer for me, I'll do
my best again.

You're always in my heart.

Love,
Justin

2003-03-20T14:55:00.000-08:00

ANGER
1. Who did you last get angry with?
Myself
2. What is your weapon of choice?
Kendo stick, nunchaku, hokuto seiken
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex?
If needed, but I'd rather not.
4. How about of the same sex?
if they pissed me off personally
5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you?
my family
6. What is your pet peeve?
too many to list
7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily?
matters what they did.

SLOTH
1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long time?
be with Fumie
2. What is the latest you've ever woken up?
never keep track of that
3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't?
I dunno, my classmates from Koyo High School
4. What is the last lame excuse you made?
I dunno really.
5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through (one of the long ones...)?
nope
6. When was the last time you got a good workout in?
Moving to the new house
7. How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today?
Alarm?

GLUTTONY
1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice?
Dunno
2. Meat eaters: white meat or dark meat?
DARK!
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event?
Dunno
4. Have you ever used a professional diet company?
nope
5. Do you have an issue with your weight?
i just i were buff like Triple H
6. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods?
spicy
7. Have you ever looked at a small housepet or child and thought, "LUNCH!"?
nope

LUST
1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies/family)?
seen completely? Fumie, Lily, Mika, Miki, Megumi, Yui
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)?
Look above
3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a member of your gender of choice during a normal conversation?
never bothered caring
4. Have you "done it"?
look at number 1
5. What is your favorite body part on a person of your gender of choice?
depends what i notice
6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute?
Nope
7. Have you ever had to get tested for an STD or pregnancy?
no

GREED
1. How many credit cards do you own?
1
2. What's your guilty pleasure store?
none
3. If you had $1 million, what would you do with it?
get the hell out of arizona
4. Would you rather be rich, or famous?
depends on what means
5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks?
how boring?
6. Have you ever stolen anything?
yes
7. How many MP3s are on your hard drive?
dont know

PRIDE
1. What one thing have you done that you're most proud of?
I dunno. Either being a reigonal Tae Kwon Do champion or being a government scholar
2. What one thing have you done that your parents are most proud of?
Look above
3. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life?
WWF Heavyweight champion
4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place?
depends who i lose to and what it counts on
5. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors?
yup
6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score?
if you're not cheating, then you're not trying
7. What did you do today that you're proud of?
nothing

ENVY
1. What item (or person) of your friends would you most want to have for your own?
A will to work for themselves
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with?
dunno
3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be?
Triple H
4. Have you ever been cheated on?
hope not
5. Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own?
wish i was as buff as triple h
6. What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself?
dont know
7. Do you wish you'd come up with this survey?
dont really care
8. Finally, what is your favorite deadly sin?
thats a hard one

The Seven Heavenly Virtues

FAITH
1. What religion do you follow?
Catholic, Buddihsim, shinto
2. What religion were you raised as?
Catholicism.
3. Do you believe that forgiveness is a religious property, or a human property?
depends on your beliefs, but i say both
4. Do you believe in magic?
well things can happen
5. What was the last promise you broke?
to make fumie happy and be by her side
6. Have you ever said the words to a prayer and not meant it?
dont nkow
7. Do you believe that anyone could be perfect?
we're only human

HOPE
1. Did you get everything you wanted over the last holiday season?
no, i couldn't go to the philippines or japan
2. Regarding your future, what is the best thing you could hope for?
just to be doing what I want. despite the situation.
3. Do you let yourself get your hopes up for something even if you know that there is a large chance of failure?
I try, that's all I can do.
5. Have you ever bought a lottery ticket?
i usually buy one once a week if it's over $20 million
6. Do you gamble?
If the stakes are high
7. Have you ever had something called off on account of bad weather, but then gone ahead and done it anyway?
what?

CHARITY
1. What causes do you support?
The Liberation of Iraq, better quality education, limiting abortions,
2. What causes have you given money or time to?
The Unviersity to international education
3. Have you ever worked in a soup kitchen or done another kind of outreach for the homeless?
just done donations
4. Would you ever consider joining the Peace Corps, Amnesty International, or another travel?
depends
5. Do you give money to the homeless on the street?
well you're better off giving them food
6. Have you ever helped out a friend with basic needs, like rent or food?
If I can
7. What's the greatest extent you've gone to help a friend in need?
... to promise that i would always love and be with her

FORTITUDE
1. What are you most afraid of?
Losing the ones I love
2. What did you do today that was really brave?
nothing really
3. Who is your favorite superhero, and why?
Hard choice.
4. Would you put your life in danger to rescue someone?
depends who it is. i
5. If you were to face the Wizard, would you want more courage, more brains, or more heart?
i dont know
6. Have you ever gotten stage fright?
nope
7. Do you consider yourself to be a leader or a follower?
servant leader

JUSTICE
1. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty?
no, even though its my duty as an american citizen
2. If they reinstituted the draft (for both genders), would you go, or would find some way out of it?
it depends
3. Do you support capital punishment (the death penalty)?
yes, but with the exception of children and disabled people
4. Which should be guaranteed legal?
dont know
5. Do you believe that Bush is rightfully President of the USA?
I'd rather have him than Al Bore
6. What was your favorite media circus trial?
OJ
7. Have you ever written a letter to a politician?
last month

TEMPERANCE
1. What do you have the hardest time moderating yourself on?
swearing, doing nothing, my emotions
2. Do you collect anything?
comics, anime, manga, porn
3. Are you addicted to anything?
anime, porn, money
4. Have you ever put anything on layaway or used an installment plan?
somewhat
5. What's your preferred method of paying for things?
depends
6. Tell us one thing you wish you hadn't let yourself do?
never leaving fumie
7. Do you feel that you obsess over things?
yes

PRUDENCE
1. Who is the wisest person you know?
probably my parents
2. Have you ever participated in a vigil?
churchness -_-
3. Do you take advice when it's given?
If I think it's good.
4. What area are you wisest in?
anime and wrestling
5. Do you drive defensively?
I did after having 2 tickets, an accident, and a 3 month suspended license
6. Have you ever had unprotected sex outside of marriage?
oh shit
7. What did you learn today?
Just another day
8. And of course, what is your favorite heavenly virtue?
love

2003-03-19T23:40:00.000-08:00

Not kicking ass. Not moving to the house this spring break and have to do homework. I want to go to Japan but my parents fear for my saftey. I'm PISSED!!!

2003-03-16T21:51:00.000-08:00

Interpretations below:

I.
Priorities in your life:
pride
money
family
love
career

II.
You would describe your own personality as being Inuyasha
You would describe your partner's personality as being Kagome
You would describe your enemy's personality as being Splinter
You interpret sex as being Foldgers
You would describe your own life as being freedom

III.
Derrick will never forget you.
You consider Mike as your real friend.
You really love My mother.
Your soul-mate is probably Fumie.
You will always remember Merc for the rest of your life.

2003-03-13T18:15:00.000-08:00

i still feel that every time i am away from fumie, it's like i am in a prison. i feel as if i am not allowed to be with her because of the distance i am away from her. i need her more than anyone. she is one of the rare people to actually see me as the person i truly am and i want her badly. even if i had one day with her on this planet left. i would at least marry her.

2003-03-11T18:26:00.000-08:00

Well, I am truly not happy with some things right now. I guess I really do feel lonley or something because I should be happy. I don't know why. I skipped school Friday and went to Mesquite High and see Ms. Wagner, went to Gamzone, ate at Arby's, played at Golfland, and hung out at Atomic Comics. Maybe I really do need a break. No, not spring break coming up next week, but a REAL break. Were things turn around for the best and everything goes right. Or maybe how I've been having a few disagreements with my family latley. I don't know. I'm losing focus in my work at some points. I use to get work done like weeks early, but for some reason I've starting procrastinating. I remember every time I would wake up from a dream about Fumie, I would cry. And Thursday night I had a dream that I was about to hold her hand and then I woke up and I started crying. I should use spring break as the opportunity to decide if I should go to Japan this summer.

2003-03-03T19:43:00.000-08:00

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2003-02-27T17:47:00.000-08:00

let's just say uh.............i just lost my smile

2003-02-23T19:07:00.000-08:00

Well we got a new house. It's all good so far. Really huge and comes witha huge ass entertainment system with surround sound and stuff. We offically start living there next month. I've been having weird dreams about Fumie recentley. I don't understand if she's cheating on me, or maybe it shows I'm secure. I also saw Ring 0. Scared the shit out of me at the end.

2003-02-16T19:57:00.000-08:00

OK I have had my ups and downs so far. I was having a good day in school. Wednesday for Biology I used my friends PRS systems and they said they would bring them back Friday. They didn't show up anyway, and I got caught. Nothing bad happened. I'm just upset they didn't come Friday. Japanese class sure was hell as fun. We did this funny skit making fun of the Tanya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan incident. Everybody thought it was comedy gold. I guess that's why it prevented my day from going bad. I also planned to call Fumie-chan but she wasn't home. So I called my host family instead and told them the 411 on what's up. My uncle gave me a job posting where I can make 800 in 2 days and I wanna do it. I showed my high school Japanese teacher Wagner-Sensei and she wishes me luck. Then I saw Daredevil and I thought it was better than Spider-Man.

Oh yeah superstition springs' pocket change closed. Bummer.

2003-02-14T22:26:00.000-08:00

Came back from seeing Daredevil which was a great movie.

2003-02-04T18:55:00.000-08:00

Right now I feel like I'm losing myself. Is it the pressure that school is giving me? Is it the pressure from my family? Hell, I don't know. For the past week now off and on I just wanted to cry. Is it because I miss Fumie? Is it because of something I've done? Shit whatever happens and/or happened, I'll make it up. Or is it I just need a fucking break?

I've started watching GTO over the weekend and I almost have the entire series. I've watched up to Episode 36. I really like it as much as the drama. Lots of anime, Japanese culture, and movie culture references. I still continue to enjoy watching Naruto and Inuyasha. I'm expecting Gundam SEED 17 sometime this week through kazaa. I enjoyed my weekend with some Initial D Arcade Stage, DDR, and PPP and Golfland. I can't wait for my next pay day. Anyway, I just realized I've been working on this shit for a year now and it still sucks.

2003-01-26T06:33:00.000-08:00

I recentley started school. It's been all right so far. Two of my friends are in my biology class. I'll do some reading later today. Got almost all of the GTO anime and I'll probably watch it in spring break hopefully. Other than that it's been all good.

2003-01-17T22:22:00.000-08:00

hmmmmm havent done this for ten days now. i've had dreams about fumie latley and they've been great

2003-01-07T20:39:00.000-08:00

I had a fun time at Raw last night. I saw my sign barley on TV. I got to see my favorite wrestler Shawn Michaels and do some sweet chin music. Man I had a great time. My new year started off terrificaly and I hope to have one of the best years ever this year. I hope I can make it the best if I can go as far as proposing to Fumie. I'll probably have my decision to go by either March or April. It means so much to me if I do go. I really deserve the vacation. I hope to have this a great year for myself. I also want to see my old school again and my former classmates from 3-4, and especailly my great host family.

2003-01-03T21:56:00.000-08:00

Well it's the new year. I was never really excited over the new years. I think it's more boring than Thanksgiving. My mom went to the Philippines yesterday and she called a few hours ago and she recentley got there. Seems that she's having fun over there. I hope things turn out the best. I know I don't hate her, it's just I strongly disagree with her policies. That's all. I start school again on the 21st and I still need a few more books to go for next semester. I hope this semester is better and I get better grades this time. I also hope to have the vacation I so deserve in May. Hopefully go to Hiroshima than the Philippines. It seems that I finish school earlier than the high school kids this year. I'll even pay my own damn ticket this year if I have to.

Anyway, I hate how people criticize me always saying I'm too excited and I show off too much. Well to those that say that, FUCK YOU!!!! What's wrong with being myself? What's wrong with (trying) to be happy? What's wrong with showing what I am capable of? I'm sick of people looking down on me. I can prove I'm better than most scum bags in this world. I guess the only place I ever felt respected for who I am and actually being given the chance to be that way during my life was my homestay in Japan. It was the one of the rare times I had during my teenage hood. Here is a short list of the fun I had as a teenager (better yet my life so far):
WWF House Show in July 98
Philippines in May/June 98
Meeting Mai in 2000
And Japan Homestay Summer 2001

I felt when I was in Hiroshima even though I'll admit I can act like a total jackass at some points, I felt happy to enjoy being myself for once and not have people like my parents or my brother to hold me back telling me this or that. You know what? I loved every second I got to be there to the point I never wanted to leave. I was happy for the first time in my life. I'm glad I met the right people in Japan. I felt it was the place for me when I came. Especailly Koyo High School. I wasn't popular because I was an MTV jock who smoked pot and liked pointless movies like Slow and the Gay, I was popular for being me. I changed that school. I defied the boundaries of cultures and the rules. I brought happiness and excitment to that school. Sure Japanese girls get overly excited but I didn't mind since I get that excited too. I think it's a good thing. I think people like my parents and my brother react to 99% of everything negativley. I always try to see the positive in everything. Even though I am less athletic than my father or not as smart as my mom and brother. I always try to be who I am. But since then I have changed. I am no longer a pacifist martial artist. I'm now a violent shoot fighter.

At least in Japan I never got shit from people. It was the type of place where I can make a friend the instant I met a certain person who I clicked with. I even had my own clique. The only person I felt I missed back in Arizona was probably Mike who has stuck with me since elementary school. I'm still glad I still hang out with him as much as I can.

But anyway, I miss dudes like Moroi (the nicest guy i ever met at school there), Jun, Ken, Shingo, and the others. They were really cool guys. I wish I could have stayed the semester or the whole year. Things would have been 100x better for me to graduate from high school. I wish I could go back in time. I wish I could have those times again when I was happy for the first time to be myself and no one told me I was being an idiot or anything. But I can never have those days back. But I will make new days once again.

2002-12-27T11:45:00.000-08:00

My best friend came over last night and we watched porn, wrestling, and played games. We had a lot of fun. Now to talk about my past WWF/E experiences. My first WWF event I ever went to was a Monday Night Raw in January of 1998. Undertaker came back on the top of the Titan Tron, Triple H beat Owen Hart for the Euro title, and the Hardcore Legends hung the outlaws upside down. Man was it great. A second WWF/E experience I had was in July 1998 at a house show. Me and my best friend got 8th row, and during the second half we got the 4th row. That was my number 1 favorite WWF/E event in my life. I remember during the intermission while they set up the cage for Undertaker Vs. Kane everybody was taking a break and me and Mike took advantage of that and we were right next to the ring stairs on the front gate. Mike had this sign that said "Kane will be destroyed by the Undertaker" and shoved it in Paul Beaer's face and laughed at us. And from the center of the ring, Kane looks at Mike and points at him. Damn we were scared stiff because the mother fucker was 7ft tall. Man Undertaker was huge too. I felt so honored to be next to a lot of my favorite WWF wrestlers. I almost broke into tears being next to a legend like the Undertaker. Man was I excited. I was also right next to Goldust (he gave me a high five), and Mark Henry I got into an argument with. He said fuck you to my face and everything. Other matches were Triple H Vs. The Rock for the IC Title, and the main event was Owen Hart Vs. Ken Shamrock in a submission no holds barred match. And the last WWF event I ever went to was a Raw in January of 1999. Chyna betrayed DX and it sucked. Now I got Raw pretty soon and cant wait to see how that will turn out.

Well my brother Derrick is being a dick once again.

2002-12-26T14:53:00.000-08:00

Well XMas turned out all right. I got Dragon Ball Z Budokai, Inuyasha Vol 1 manga, Hollywood Hulk Hogan, Para Para Paradise Vol 1, new clothes, Initial D 3rd Stage DVD, Samurai Troopers vol 3 DVD. Everything kicked ass. Xmas was all right but I wish I could of spent it with Fumie. Speaking of Fumie, she sent me a cool XMas card over the net. I'll post it later and show it to you guys. I still can't wait for Raw. I'll tell you about 3 previous WWF/E experiences later.

2002-12-24T07:03:00.000-08:00

well i passed all my classes. all good for me. i started watching rockman.exe. pretty good anime. i also got some episodes of Majo No Joken and the entire GTO drama series and the movie. All I need now is the special. Today is XMas EVE and I can open some shit. Hooray.

2002-12-16T09:45:00.000-08:00

I don't really know if i hate or love my life or anything, but in general it's just something I really can't understand. All my life I meet the right people, be at the right place, but always at the wrong time. Most people I've been meeting all my life in elementary and defenitley Jr. High were defenitley scum bags, and they suck. But when it came to love lives, the women i met 90% of the time were older than me. Like Mika, Lily, and Mai. But the only true love I felt I truly want to be with Fumie, is a year and a half younger than me. I felt like I met the right person at the right place, hell maybe even the right time. Maybe it was just that I did not know how to use it. For a year and a half now not a day goes by where I don't think about Fumie. I over heard her talking to her friend and my host brother that she was very interested in me. She though I didn't understand when she was conversing but I decided to figure out a way to show her appreciation and feelings before I left. She was young and pretty. I felt that this girl was right for me. I still believe she is. I can never stop thinking about her. She's on my mind and in my heart 24/7. 365/12. I just can't avoid her. I am desperate to see this girl again. I don't care but before I die I want to be with her one more time. If I were to die right now I'd be with her right now making love to her like I once did. I just want to be with her forever.

2002-12-15T14:27:00.000-08:00

Had my math exam Thursday. It was very easy since I studied my ass off and I'm hoping to get a C or a B in the class. But I know I will get a C because I fucking worked hard. Even though I suck so bad at math, there is no way in hell that I'm failing once as I go throughout college in 3-3 1/2 years. Tommorow is my geography exam which I am well prepared for, and Wednesday I have Japan, and finally I have psychology on Friday which I will also kick ass on and it's a one month break of kicking more ass.

2002-12-11T10:22:00.000-08:00

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I got my Raw tickets for Jan. 6th. 30th row section 104. It's going to rule. I really got nothing special planned for this X-Mas break at all. I hope it turns out good. I watched all of Candidate for Goddess all in one day and it was all right but could of gone on longer. I got nothing special happening besides having my finals start tommorow which is math which I will defenitley kick ass on and my study habits are going well. Anyway wish me luck.

2002-12-05T20:10:00.000-08:00

Well, I guess I'm doing all right right now. I'm sending christmas cards to the Miyazaki's and Fumie. That's all. School is almost over and I'm going to Raw in January if I get kick ass tickets. Nothing special has been happening latley.

2002-11-29T16:53:00.000-08:00

Things are going ok latley. I enjoyed this weeks Raw and SmackDown!. My week is going pretty ok so far except for today. Monday I just went to class and had the usual. Took my test in Japanese and my project conference in English. Tuesday was just a regular day as usual. Wednesday I had a speaking test with my friend Merc and me, Merc, and Cheryl (yes, the girl i liked at one point) are going to be a group (I think Merc is on to me when I said I knew Chery's number). But things are cool. Went to my aunt's house for Thanksgiving. It was all right. Played (se)X-Box. Nothing fun. Played with Kitt and ate some food. But had fun in the end. Today was full of shit where I had some good coupons and wanted to buy smoe anime DVDs but noooooooooooooooooooooo they don't apply to DVDs or any shit on sale. WELL FUCK YOU SUNCOAST!!!

Tuesday, my host mother from Japan called like around midnight after I fell asleep after watchign Raw. Forgot what the fuck she said. I may need to call her again just in case.

2002-11-26T14:10:00.000-08:00

HAVE YOU EVER:
-prank called someone: yes
-been prank called: tried... they failed XD
-fallen asleep in class: yeah even in elementary school
-been suspended since first grade: yeah
-been expelled: nope
-contemplated suicide: never
-attempted suicide: nope
-seen someone die: nope
-cut yourself: unintentionally
-slit your wrists: never
-flirty eye contacted someone in class: In class? oh yeah
-fantasized about someone: who hasn't?
-kissed someone else's partner: no
-had oral sex with someone else's partner: no
-trashed a hotel room: HELL YEAH
-trashed someone's home at a house party: nope
-worried about your friends? constantly
-had your friends worry about you? of course

LAST PERSON YOU:
-told that you loved them: Fumie
-spoke to on the phone: my host mother
-got an e-mail from: MSN message service
-spoke to on-line: I think Nate
-bitched with: I think Ryan
-bitched about: a lot of things
-missed: Fumie
-were excited about seeing: Fumie
-wished you could see more of: Fumie
-wished you would see less of: ass clowns
-fought with verbally: my mom
-fought with physically: my brother, we were just messing around
-wanted to kiss: Fumie-Chan
-had sex with: Mika
-wanted to have sex with: Fumie
-saw: my brother
-swore at: i dunno... i swear constantly
-laughed at: Chris Jericho
-dated: Mika
-dumped: Mika
-were dumped by: Cheryl Shimata

WHICH FAMOUS PERSON WOULD YOU:
-have sex with: I dont know. Maybe Trish Stratus
-like to have a philosophical talk about life with: Shawn Michaels or Hulk Hogan
-like to have as a best friend: Hulk Hogan
-bring back to life: Andre the Giant or Owen Hart

EITHER OR:
ALL OF THESE ARE MUSIC QUESTIONS THAT I DON'T LISTEN TO

5 things you love:
1. Wrestling
2. Video Games
3. Baseball
4. Japan
5. Anime

5 things you hate (strongly dislike):
1. Ass clowns
2. jackasses
3. faggots
4. biters
5. liberals

5 things you don't understand:
1. life
2. quebec wrestling
3. why they interept that i hate women or against women just because i'm pro life
4. al gore's faggotry
5. why janet napolitano won the governor election

5 negative facts about you:
1. lazy
2. hateful
3. stuborn
4. loser
5. immature

5 positive facts about me
1. I
2.am
3.the
4.King of
5.The World

5 positive facts about you:
1. i am
2. the best there is
3. the best there was
4. and
5. the best there ever will be

5 things you plan to do before you die:
1. wrestle in madison square garden
2. WWF champion
3. marry fumie and start a family
4. kill all the ass clowns i hate
5. buy a hell of a lot of cars

5 Things You Can't Do:
1. Jericho's ability
2. wrestle full time
3. math
4. draw hands
5. be with fumie

5 Famous Bands You Want to Meet:
1. L'arc en ciel
2. Fozzy
3. X-Japan
4. Morning Musume
5. Baby VOX

5 things that turn you on about your sex of choice:
1. Face
2. smile
3. humor
4. eyes
5. sweetness

5 movies (in no particular order):
1. Ring
2. Char's Counterattack
3. Inuyasha the Love that transcends time
4. The World is Not Enough
5. GTO

Top 5 things you say the most:
1. kick ass
2. ass clown
3. dude
4. damn
5. whoa

[name] Justin Moriarty
[age] 18
[sex] male
[dob] June 24, 1984
[location] of birth Omaha, NB currently Gilbert, AZ
[siblings] 1 1/2 sister, 1 1/2 brother, 2 btoerhs
[flirty] if i want to be
[shoe size] 9
[hair color] brown
[first crush] Jackie Woodward
[do you have a crush on someone right now] Fumie-Chan
[if so what is their name] Fumie Chou
[color of your room] white
[righty or lefty] left
[hobbies] internet, video games, wrestling, anime, drawing, manga
[sign] Gilbert

QUESTIONS ON GIRLS > o_O i think i'll fill these out anyway

[panties or panties?] white cotton
[long/short hair] usually short, but depends
[tall or short] shorter than me... 5'4 @_@
[pack/muscular arms] Slim, thin
[good/bad girl] innocent
[tan or fair] i guess both
[accent or american] sweet asian one
[would you ever go out with someone whos ugly] dont know
[punk or prep] school girl

PREFERENCES
[cuddle or make out] cuddle with occasional kissing
[chocolate milk, or hot chocolate] choco milk
[mcdonalds or burger king] Burger King
[coke or pepsi] coke
[would you wanna marry your best friend, or the perfect lover] what if this person is both
[root beer, or dr pepper] neither
[tea/coffee/cappuccino] Parfe
[cats or dogs] penguin
[mud or jello wrestling] HLA! HLA! HLA!
[milk, dark, or white chocolate] DARK
[sunny or rainy] Sunny
[winter, summer, fall, or spring] middle of summer
[vanilla or chocolate] chocolate
[skiing or boarding] neither
[biking or blading] biking
[cereal or toast] cereal!
[do you enjoy listening to rock, punk rock, hip hop, rythem and blues, alternative rock, electrionic, or country] eurobeat
[bunk or water bed] water bed
[lights on or off] off

FRIENDS
[My friends] way too many.
[Friends that you look like] never thougho f that
[You go to for advice] Merc
[Who do you tell all your secrets to] Mike and PJ

FAVOURITES
[color] anything dark
[number] none
[movie] Initial D 3rd Stage
[subject] Japanese
[song] Space Boy-Dave Rodgers
[sport to play] baseball
[sport to watch] wrestling
[favorite drink] coke
[truth or dare] truth
[ocean or pool] ocean

[silver or gold] remember the name.....goldust
[diamonds or pearls] diamonds
[sunset or sunrise] sunset
[showers or bubble baths] showers!

MORE FAVOURITES
[Shampoo] the bottled kind
[Toothpaste] the stuff that comes out onto a toothbrush
[soap] the stuff that lathers
[Type of soup] ramen
[Room in your house] my room
[Instrument] piano

IN THE LAST TWO DAYS HAVE YOU..
[cried] wanted to
[Helped someone] hopefully
[Bought something] sketch book
[Gotten sick] no
[Gone to the movies] Guess I'll die another day
[Gone out for dinner] Dont know
[Said "I love you"] to someone? Fumie-Chan ga daisuki
[Written a real letter] i will soon though
[Moved on] no
[Talked to an ex] yup
[Missed an ex] yeah
[Written in a journal] yes
[Talked to someone you have a crush on] yes
[Had a serious talk] yes
[Missed someone] very much
[Hugged someone] yes
[Fought with your parents] over the stupidest things
[Fought with a friend] no
[Wore eye shadow] no
[Put on a "front"]nope
[Kiss on the first date] nope
[Have a crush on someone] nope
[Eat with your mouth open]no

AGAIN MISC QUESTIONS
[If you got a tattoo, where would you get it, and what would be] like the one yo has in crying freeman
[What color is our floor/carpet in your room] gray
[What was the last CD you bought] dont remember
[How did you spend last summer] summer school at ASU
[When's the last time you showered] This morning
[Are you tired] very
[Are you lonely] i miss her
[Are you happy] yes
[Are you wearing pajamas]no
[Are you talking to someone online] no
[What is your astrological sign] Cancer
[What time is it] 5pm mountain

2002-11-23T19:29:00.000-08:00

For almost a year now some people besides myself have been reading this blog seeing how I have been doing and how I feel on a regular basis but I never once posted once about myself. I guess it's now time to post a blog about who I am and all. Be prepared for one hell of a long blog.

My full name is Douglas Justin Respicio Moriarty II. Born on June 24, 1984 in Omaha, Nebraska. My father Douglas Michael Moriarty, a Vietnam veteran and a serviceman to the airforce and married my mom shortly after he divorced his first wife. My mom Julieta Maria Respicio is from Laoag, Philippines and her family was very rich and high political connections to Marcos during his regime and are still pretty big there. I don't remember jack shit about Nebraska and was only there for a while and haven't been there since. After that we moved to Korea and lived there for a year, and then we moved to California, then to the Philippines, back to California, to Seattle, then to here in Arizona. I don't have that much memories of my day's in Elementary School. I remember I loved watching cartoons and pro-wrestling. California was a pretty nice place to live and Philippines I still have some fond memories of.

In California, I first got into martial arts when Ernie Reyes, Jr. (Keno from Ninja Turtles 2, Johnny from Surf Ninjas) came into town and was opening a school a mile from my house. I met the guy and got a picture with him and his autograph. He was a pretty cool guy in real life. He's Filipino like me and we became tight like that. Even though he was not my official instructor, but two guys that lived in the Silicon Valley were. One was Gary Nakahama, and the other was this big blonde military looking dude named Duke. Duke was really a nice guy and passionate about how Tae Kwon Do and so was Gary. They would always be with you every step of the way. But I only took lessons there for like 4 months there and had to move to Arizona. But when I moved there I still continued with my Tae Kwon Do lessons and won 1st place in Spring of 1996 in a reigonal sparring tournament.

Then I moved here to Arizona 10 years ago sometime in July. Then I started school in Houston Elementary and finished there from 3rd grade to 6th grade. The first year was alright. My teacher was originally Mrs. Gressel and then all of a sudden she dissapeared and some mean old bitch named Mrs. Robinson took over. Because I hated her so much and was a compelte bitch, she officailly left that year ended. I met a girl named Jackie Woodward there and we both liked each other. Then I forgot what happened, and then we hated each other for the rest of the year. I mean we still see each other as friends every now and then. She's grown into quite a woman and my taste in women has changed since. Me and Jackie made up for lost times in 5th grade and became friends again. We had a class in science in 7th grade, a class in english in 10th grade, and a class in economics recentley our Sr. year of high school. I mean things became really cool with us. And ever since graduation, we haven't talked since. But I'm bound to see her again sometime around and be a nice guy to her.

4th grade was when my 2 years of shit happened during elementary school. I mean because I was different and had a completley different set of hobbies from the others was what made kids tease me. I put up with some crap from time to time. I typically only had 2 friends during the 4th grade. Rick Santiago and Daniel Merril. They were pretty smart people and cool to hang around with. We were all into stuff like comics like X-Men, Spider-Man, Thor, and the other stuff. My 4th grade teacher Mr. Herbold had a great sense of humor, but could also be strict as well. Since me and Mr. Herbold clicked so well in many things, I'd always see him after school just to talk about stuff like X-Men when we should of used that time to help me with my schoolwork. That got him a little upset but we were still tight. I was also into Power Rangers, and the other kids weren't. I thought it kicked ass to be honest and I think the first season still does. Even though the acting and the special effects still stink after all these years, but I loved the action because I was into martial arts. But still the kids teased me just because I liked it, and gave me shit. I let it slide because I knew it was not worth it. The older kids sometimes gave me shit and I had to defend myself. School for me became a battle field at some points.

5th grade people were still giving me shit. Some faggot named Caylon Silvers (I still saw him throghout high school but we never talked to each other or looked at each other), thought he was all bad getting into my face. One time in the middle of class he punched me in the face and I didnt do anything. I thought it wouldnt have been worth it. Maybe I would of kicked his ass but I didn't want to. That was it. I came home and regretted not fighting him.

Then a couple of weeks after that was winter break, I went to the Philippines and hanged out with my cousins. Even though I don't get to see them ofter, I'm still tight with my family there. During my stay there (I was 10 at the time in 5th grade), I started my interest in anime through the influence of my cousins. One anime that really caught my attention that my cousin's loved was Dragon Ball Z. I watched an episode (it was around the Android/Cell saga) and thought it was way cooler than X-Men or anything. But I bring that up because I liked the fighting and the reasons why they fight. It influenced me to think that fighting is the right thing to do and whether or you win or lose, fight with your pride in your heart. I realized I had no pride. Even though I didn't want to leave the Philippines I wanted to leave with my pride.

Then I came back and if anyone gave me shit, I'll fight this time. One day Caylon through sand behind my back and went up to his face. He hit me and then I charged up and screamed like a Super Saiya-Jin and beat him up Dragon Ball Z style. People knew I went over the edge and I totaled the living crap out of him. I started laughing manically and was proud and even when the teachers were trying to break us apart, I wanted more, I was able to fight their hold and beat the living shit out of Caylon some more and more. Then his friends tried to come and I totaled them to. I really felt like my anger was taking over me. I even enjoyed hurting them for hurting me all those months. I didn't really fight for an apology or anything, I just did it for my pride.

I got suspended, but I didn't care. My parents were wondering what happened to me. They though I turned crazy. I told them everything what happened and all that stuff and it was time to stand up for myself. My parents couldn't believe what I became. I mean originally during my Tae Kwon Do teachings, I was taught to never use them on school grounds or unless I really needed to. They were right. I mean back then I was a hardcore pacifist and I didn't even want to hurt anyone no matter how much they treated me with disrespect. But I always learned that to treat people the way you want to be treated and it is better to give than recieve. Then DBZ taught me about pride and the joy of fight. Then those days became when I would actually result to violence as I do now.

During my 10 day suspension I really took some time to cool off (sometime in mid january). My cousins gave me some DBZ tapes in the mail and some DBZ shirts. I watched the DBZ tapes and I got really into it and wanted to get more into anime. Then I went to the arcade one day at the mall with one of my DBZ shirts and the arcade got Street Fighter Alpha. I played for awhile and really got into it and was beating everyone who challenged. Then a 14 year old Japanese girl then played against me using Rose and I was Ryu. Our first match was a time limit draw, and I beat her the rest of the time. She said that she was never beaten at the game before and said I was pretty good for my age. I said thanks and I said she wasn't that bad for a girl. I introduced myself to her and and the girl introduced herself as Mika Yoshikawa. She then looked at my shrit and realized that my shirt was based off a show that was popular in Japan. She said she liked my shirt and was also a big Dragon Ball fan. I told her I recentley got into it and I liked it a whole lot. I told her it wasn't officilly released in the United States yet, but I have relatives from the Philippines who give me this stuff. Mika was from Japan and was staying a mile and a half away from my house and was going to my high school at the time. We became very good friends. My friends Rick and Daniel recentley broke off from me because my parents wouldn't let me hang out with them and Mika had trouble making friends because of her poor English. She was in a home with no children. Despite our odd age differences we became good friends. I mean I didn't care about Rick and Daniel anymore. Slowly my feelings started to change. Like it was more than friendship. I couldn't help sometimes but to stare at her breasts or have a peak up her skirt when she wasn't looking. I mean was this love or lust?

But in our months that would later evolve to an off and on relationship really grew strong. Our first year together really brought up a lot of fun and joy. Sometimes we even held hands in public and people would look at us weird or assume we were brother and sister. I looked up to Mika like she was my sister, even though my heart told me other wise. But my friendship with her changed forever. From Mika she exposed me more to anime, taught me some Japanese, calligraphy, and culture. I taught her some Tae Kwon Do, Baseball, and some video game tips. I really enjoyed my relationship with her. Even though my life and home and at school was in the pits, it didnt keep me fomr not smiling because outside we were always there waiting for each other. I really did have fun with this girl. I remember before 5th grade ended, I had around almost $200 from allowance. I was at the mall one day and I saw some rings. I say this nice heart ring for $175 and thought Mika would defenitley like it. I bought it. I was still too shy to give it her for about a month. And a few days after my 11th birthday, me and Mika went out for some ice cream and when we were walking in freestone park, i finally gave her the ring and I asked her to marry me. I didn't know what I was thinking. I just said the words from out of no where. Seeing that I just said those words, I felt like I had to tell her that I did love her and I always wanted her to be with me. I told her I just wanted to be with her forever until I died. I put the ring on her and she kissed me. I really don't know if we ever became a couple nor did she know. I was 11 and she was 14. I mean we speant our time together like we were a couple and even acted like one. I mean, she even let me explored her body at some times. Then around the fall of 1995, she had to go on with her life. I mean we were crying in each other's arms. We promised we would meet again one day. And then I went on with my life always thinking about her and we still wrote and called and e-mailed each other.

Then school started. 6th grade, final year of elementary and can't screw up now. I made some new friends and met my best friend to this day. I met Brandon Berella, Ryan Klienman, Paul Gheen, and Mike Hosler. I mean we practically became the clique. We all got into cars and James Bond movies. They also got into anime and it was all good. We had a pretty cool year. Especailly at science camp in the spring of 1996. It was pretty fun. Then the following week, we had a class trip to Colorado. That was when me and Mike got pretty close. I mean we talked more often and all that stuff. Then the week after that, my family went to Europe and we all had fun. Then I came back and had fun with all my friends. But Brandon moved to New Mexico and Ryan just went somewhere and detached himself from us.

When Jr. High came, it was just me, Mike and Paul. Then in October, Paul moved to Alaska and it was just me and Mike. We haven't heard from Paul since. Jr. High pretty much blowed for me. There I met some weirdo named Seung Joon Kum. He was an all right guy. We would know each other from there to the end of high school. We were just acquantinces even though we seemed like friends. He was pretty popular while me and Mike weren't. In Jr. High I pretty much followed the Big Poppa Pump philosophy of people are scum bags and they suck. Hell, I still follow that phrase. Then in 8th grade when people were getting on my fucking nerves. Mika finally came back. We had our 2 weeks of fun. She seems to have grown and so have I. We didn't really do anything romantic, but we still had the attraction. We really didn't do much but talk and hang out. But it was fun to see each other again. Then we would see each other again 2 years later (which I will get into later). In Jr. High there was this Filipino/Puerto Rican girl I met named Cora Cruel. I wasn't interested in her, but she had a thing for me. I mean I had nothing against her except for the fact she was with the popular crowd and me and the popular crowd hated each other (for reasons which I don't know why) and there was this ass clown I remember named Josh who I threatened to shoot if he didn't get off my back and he had the nevre to tell on the principal. I would of kicked his ass like hell but hell he was on the football team and they would have been after me. Hell, 15% of the football team had shit with me for whatever reason. Be thankful I didn't fucking own a gun or even built a bomb. I just literally wished I could turn Super Saiya-Jin or do a kamehameha. Even though I'm over it now, I'll take them on anytime if they don't get their football jabronies backing them up and it will be fine.

One fag I really hated back in the pointless world of Jr. High was a jackass named Cutter Mortenson. My friend Paul had shit with him and kicked the crap out of him all the time. That ass clown also rode on the same bus as me at the time. One time on the bus that jerk was giving me and threatned my family. When we got to my stop I stepped back and I gave him some sweet chin music HBK style, gave the crotch chop and told him to suck it. Hell those were the days when DX first came. I remember a year prior to that Cutter threw my backpack and I gave him a fameasser (a rocker dropper). We were suppose to have a fight the following day at the park but didn't show. Same thing in 8th grade. That punk couldn't even get in the building. I remember the next day at school when I gave him some sweet chin music, he had a mark on his chin and he went to my face and told me that i was telling everyone that i kicked his ass. Well I said, "Well Justin 3:16 says I kicked your ass." He then pushed me, and then I kicked him in the stomach and I gave him a fucking pedigree and gave him another suck it. A lot of people were freaked like hell. Me, Mike, and our new friend John Mosher were practically the degenarates of Gilbert Jr. High and respected no one. Hell because of my years of being a wrestling fan, I knew how to talk shit and back it up. Like I knew how to talk shit like Jesse Ventura, be intense as Hulk Hogan, and egotistical as Shawn Michaels. I mean I thought it was pretty cool and I used that a lot in Jr. High.

OK I'll have 2 more Jr. High stories and I'll go on with the story. One time at a concert I was performing in at 8th grade, I finished my performance and some group of punks were giving me shit. Some little ass clown punches me in the face and I kick him in the stomach and he's bending over. Then I give that little jabronie the razor's edge and in front of his friends I do the Razor Ramon taunts and throw a tooth pick at one of those jackasses. Hell I felt great. And during graduation I went to all of the kids I hated and did a crotch chop to their face and told them to suck it. Hell my liberation from Jr. High was great. Then I learned that in the Philippines they didn't have this Jr. High crap and I got pretty upset. But I got cool with it.

That following summer I went to the Philippines after 3 1/2 years. It was all right and all cool. I had a lot of fun meeting all my cousins again and we all had fun for those 2 weeks together. Last time I went to the Philippines priror the one I am talking about. I felt like I left missing something and that was why I wanted to stay. But this time I felt like I found something and was satisfied with my trip. I spent a lot of time with PJ, JM, Kristine, and Sofie. We all had fun. The beach, birthday parties, and whole bunch of other stuff. It ruled. I came back fully recharged.

Then I started high school pretty fresh. I met a lot of new people. Like Pablo Ogaz, Jackie Winfield, Celia Wang, Serrina Serravantos, Amanda Conrad, Justina Tam, Terry Bautista, Nozomi Tanaka, and many others. Three years of high school, me and Mike went to differetn schools but only saw each other on like a weekley basis. During sophmore year, Mike moved to Illinois and he hated it. Then he moved back and we renewed our friendship to a fresh start. Freshman year was interesting. That was the year when I first started taking Japanese lessons. My school offered it and I was sick of playing the violin. I quit playing it and decided to do something new since I was a bit familiar with some Japanese and I was big into anime. My parents were strongly against the idea of me taking it, but it was my descision to make. I took Japanese and enrolled in the 4th week of school. I caught up pretty quickly and was at the top of the class.Normally I got C's but Japanese was the first ever subject I ever got an A in and it won my approval from my Japanese teacher who I would have for 3 years in a row and a great friend for a lifetime who would do so much for me. My parents were shocked at this and were excited. I really proved them wrong and a hell of a lot of people. The first friend I made was an 18 year old African-American anime fan. She was black on the outside, but Asian on the inside. Then she introcudced me to Amanda and Seriina. Those were the starting days of J-Mo, The Live Action Anime Boy (long story which I won't get into). We all became a pretty good clique. Serrina would be my woman for 3 1/2 weeks the following month. I mean things became cool between us and it made my freshman year a bit more interesting. I remember me and Pablo use to play fight infront of Jackie and Amanda. Jackie was amazed how good I was at Jiu-Jitsu (she's like a brown belt) when I went against Pablo or other people. I just told her I fight out of instinct. She found that interesting. My freshman year ended descentley.

Sophmore year things were the same but 10x better. I got more involved with school and I started officailly dating. From October to April, I dated a girl named Celia Wang. The President of Asian club. She was a sweet and pretty girl. We had a good relationship but due to family problems our relationship had to end. A week after I used Serrina as rebound material just to shake off Celia. Serrina was a bitch throughout our short relationship but I partially blame it on me when I look back on it. I mean I shouldn't have treated her like that. Then I went to the Philippines after my Sophmore year. Things worked out ok there for me but things didn't go as I hoped for. I mean I didn't think my last trip to the Philippines was really that fun. I thought it was kind of boring in my opinion, but I met a lot of new people through PJ. Even though I am not in contact with them after that incident, they seemed pretty cool with me as I was cool with them. I remember PJ and my Tita Amor took me to Fort Iloconda (sp?) a kick ass resort in Laoag. This group they belonged to for UP Ilocano students were having this interview and I was behind the scenes. It seemed pretty exciting for all of us. It gave me something to do and meet some new people (I decided to pick up some people skills while I was still there). I met this girl named Mai-Mai I think. For some reason after I met her, I wanted to break it off with Serrina and I did when I came back. She was upset but it had to be done.

Then after my stay in the Philippines, my family stayed in Tokyo for 2 days. We couldn't make it to the city because we didn't really have enough money to go. It really pissed me off. I remembered after my parents went to sleep I snuck out and took a bus to Tokyo and met with Mika. We were pretty excited to see each other. We were together for a few hours. But we held hands and she wore the ring I gave her. It was a romantic moment for the both of us. I made it back by like 5am and everyone was still asleep. I told Mika to come visit me if she can. Then three hours later she shows up and we pretty much sneak off downstairs for breakfast and talk a bit. I told her that I really didn't understand who I was anymore for some strange reason and I met some person who convinced me that my mother is too much on me and she's restraing me too much. After that I didn't understand who I was for almost a year and it drove me insane. I promised to keep this a secret with Mika, but I think she will understand. I told Mika I still had feelings for her but not the same I had 6 years ago.

Then a month after I came back from the Philippines I met a girl at the mall infront of the arcade. She dropped all her bags and I decided to help her out and carry some of her stuff to her car. She was a really attractive Asian looking girl with a little bit of an Australian accent. She said her name was Lily McGuire. I got her number and the following Friday or so was her birthday and I took her to the fair and we had a lot of fun. Lily was 4 years older than me as well. She turned 20 on our first date. Her father was half Australian (with an Irish name) and half Filipino. Her mother was half Filipino and half Japanese. Her parents both met from Oxford. And hell, they are fucking rich. Lily practically owns 2 cars. She was born with a silverspoon in her mouth. We dated for 6 months. But we had a lot of fun. Lily was an uncontrollable girl when it came to sex. Hell I was too. A month into our relationship we started an unprotected sexual relationship. Even on our first date I was already reaching down her clothes. We were both virgins when we started so I guess we were equal. I still remember our first night together as if it were last night and still remember the sensation and the pleasure we gave each other. But hell I watch a lot of porn so it helped me alot. I found it funny Lily liked porn too. Our relationship ended when her parents were going through her private stuff and founded out she was having a relationship with a punk ass teenager and we ended up breaking up. We didn't speak to each other for around 3 months. Then we talked again and we just became friends since. Hell, we still had sex.

During that time I was taking it hard. I thought I was never going to see her again. During that time my student teacher was there for me. Nozomi Tanaka. I developed a crush on her and even admitted it to her. She found that sweet, but says that we could never do that. But anyway, I'll jump to another subject that happened around my Jr. year of high school. Around November, my brother gave me these forms to sign up for a scholarship and a homestay in Japan. I signed up with the reccomendations from my teachers. I entered the Youth for Understanding organization and a month later I heard from there that I am qualified and another month later I was interviewed and a week later I win the scholarship. I was pretty excited to actually go to Japan that summer. Because the summer prior to that, I felt like a lot of things were robbed from me and I felt as if no one was paying attention to me anymore. It got me pretty excited. And as usual, my mother was highly objective to this because of my lack of responsibilty and attitude or whatever. Hell, I didn't care. I put so much hardwork and passion into this and I felt like I really deserved it. This was the first time I ever wanted something so bad. I didn't care what I was. This was something that I wanted and the only thing that was going to stop me was to have me dead. I worked hard to get that scholarship and I earned it the way I wanted it and was going to have things my way.

Then a month later I learned I was going to stay in Hiroshima with the Miyazaki's. Kozo the father was a company man, the mother Hisako was an Elementary School teacher. They had 4 sons but only one was living with them. The only living with them Sou, was a 20 year old college student and played baseball on the college team. I thought it was really cool. But first, let's get into what I won. I won that Japan U.S. Senate Scholarship. Only one student from each state can win this and the winner gets to visit the Ministry of Education, and the Govenor of their homestay prefecture. I thought it kicked ass. I was in Tokyo for 3 days and I had the time of my life. I called Mika but we couldn't meet each other which stunk like hell. But it was still great to know she was all right. But my family was incredibly nice people. To be honest, this was kind of the life I always wanted. My host parents weren't really that dicatative. They loved me, I thought it was the best time I ever had. I mean I thought it was for the time I ever had.

My host father showed me where he worked. It was pretty nice. His father runs a company called Tarpel. They sell electronics and they a good company despite the recession. He would often go to his parents abondoned house and take care of it. He was a pretty dedicated family man even though he would never show any affection to his wife. My host mother took me to her work a few times. The kids there were nice even though a couple of 8 year olds had a crush on me but I thought that it would be natural =p. But seeing how I was in their position at one time with liking older people I guess I couldn't really resist them that much (not it's not what you think). My older brother introduced me to his baseball team and they were pretty cool. He even introduced me to his woman. We went to a few baseball games and had kick ass seats. It was a lot of fun. I still remember this drunk lady hitting on me when I was checking out these 2 high school girls in front of me with short skirts. But it was one of the best times of my life. I am still in contact with my host family and they are are always excited to hear from me.

The school I had was pretty kick ass too. Everyone there was pretty cool even though there were some jabronies that wanted a piece of me I bet but didn't have the balls to, but it was the best time of my life. Hell I met a lot of women and I had my way with them. The first girl I met was Megumi Ohta, she was the typical girl next door and showed me how to get to school by train. Another girl I met was Yui Fujimoto, she was introduced to me by Megumi and she was also in my class. The last girl I met in school that I would a stand with was Miki Watari. She was also in my homeroom and was friends with Yui and Megumi. Megumi I guess we were naturally attracted to each other. She was over at the house one night when everyone was out and then we started kissing each other in my room and things went out of countrol from there and had some fun. Then a week later I'm over at Yui's and the same thing happens. And then a week and a half later when the semester ended in Japan, Miki invites me to a sleep over on the beach. i thought it was just going to be us and a few friends, but it was just the two of us and she seduced me. Even though the sex felt great, i still partially regret it because I didn't know what I was thinking, I was just a guy who wanted to have fun by any means necessary and I felt like I was robbed of everything of my life for a whole year until that time and decided to enjoy life while I was there.

Then a few days later my host father told me a co-workers daughter was interested in going out on a date with me. He told me that she was a pretty nice girl, 2 years younger than me, really cute, and eager to meet me. Since he was hooking me up on a date I couldn't refuse such a generous offer. He told me we would meet at some summer festival. I was really excited to meet her because I knew she was bound to be a pretty nice person. Then the night came. I see a really tall, slim, short haired teenage Japanese girl. She said her name was Fumie (Chou). I thought she was a really kind person. Her name sounded rare to me but then again, I love mystery. Fumie seemed like that kind of person. We enjoyed the night we met in that humid summer day in July looking at the fireworks display and it was so romantic. We really talked a lot. Then after the festival she wanted to walk around town and show me around I guess. Before we took off my host father sneaks me a coupon to a love hotel down the street. He says to have some fun. I wasn't really sure if I should have done such a thing, but he told me to anyway and don't come back the next morning. I couldn't really believe he wanted me to get it on with Fumie. A 15 year old girl. I remember me and Fumie talked about a few things such as previous relationshps. I said they usually don't last that well or long but they feel like a lifetime. She said she had one a year ago but only lasted for a few weeks and just broke up. Then we went to the hotel. We had a hell of a lot of fun. I mean yeah we had sex for like the 50th time ever in my life or whatever and the 5th woman i ever had. I couldn't believe what I am getting myself into.

The next week we went out on another date, we went to a movie and had some chocolate parfe. I really had some fun. The moments I were with Fumie, I felt like she was the girl for me. She says she really would like to get married one day and have a child. I told her I felt the same way. I kind of felt like we would have a promising relationship. But after our date I forgot to give her my contact info. The following week, I had to return home to America. Then in my suitcase I found some piece of fancy jewelry in the luggage and thought maybe Fumie would like it. I didn't know why it was there. I knew Fumie is someone I can't let go. I gave it to her along with my contact info and a sealed kiss. I did not want to leave Japan without making any regrets.

Then I returned to Arizona. Things turned out better than I thought in Japan. I have no regrets besides leaving Fumie and a family I would rather have behind. After my return from Japan, I got more shit than ever from everyone. It sucked like hell. My senior year turned out all right. But there was one time I betrayed my love for Fumie during my senior year of High School. At the ASU orientation during spring break that year, I met a girl named Cheryl Shimata. We had the same major and I was intrigued by her beauty. I was desperate to see her again and probably go out with her. I really started to like this girl, but my mom was being objective about me going out with Cheryl for ludicrous reasons and it gave me and my mom some heat between us. After awhile, my interest for Cheryl dropped because I think it was a forbidden crush.I mean we are still good friends. Things turned out for the best though.

Then in June this year, I became 18. My mom gave me shit but I didn't care because all she wants to do is play victim nowadays and it's not going to work. Then in July I started college and passed my class with an A and made lots of friends. It was a great time. Then in October last month, Mika came. I betrayed my love for Fumie once again as I finnally played the moves on Mika. We finally found we have feelings for each other. I decided to make love to her just this once just to ease things between us and close our love each other once and for all and we did. Well, I am still a college student and I called Fumie last week and she seems great. I told her I feel regretful that I can not come to Japan for Christmas. Then again I could always use my Christmas wish. My classes are going all right at ASU right now and I hope to graduate a semester or a year early. I also plan to hope to come to Japan in the summer. My next present for Fumie is defenitley a music box.

Well that's it for me.

2002-11-23T06:39:00.000-08:00

Well my favorite wrestler Shawn Michaels is now Heavyweight Champion after 4 years. All great. And the Big Slow is the WWF champion (I still refuse to acknowledge it as the WWE). Nothing much happened. Kanji test in Japanese which I believe I did well on. I saw Die Another Day last night. It was a pretty cool movie, but the special effects sorta sucked. For some reason I felt like crying these past few days.

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2002-11-17T17:52:00.000-08:00

I had a pretty descent day today. I went to golfland. I played Initial D, DDR 5th Mix, DDR 4th Mix, and Para Para Paradise. All seemed cool. Finished my homework too. Tonight is WWF Survivor Series.

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2002-11-17T08:26:00.000-08:00

Woke up a few hours ago. Called Fumie last night. She seems all right. I still gotta do some paper for English. I don't know what I want to do today still.

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2002-11-16T14:13:00.000-08:00

Not much going on right now. Yesterday was all right. I lost all my Japanese stuff yesterday for like 2 hours. Sucked big time. But I got it back and gave all the stuff to Sensei. And I forgot what else happened yesterday. I'll try to call Fumie today.

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2002-11-13T17:22:00.000-08:00

Yesterday and today seemed cool to me so far. Yesterday had it's ups and downs but it turned out for the best in the end. I got a 78 in my math test. I was hoping for a minimum of a 75 and I did 3 pts better. Still hoping to get at least a C- (70%) at the end of the semester. I gotta registar for Spring classes on the 20th. Wagner-Sensei, my Japanese teacher from my freshman to junior year of high school called me yesterday. Late last month I got a letter from ASU saying who was one of my best teachers from High School, and I chose Wagner-Sensei. She called me saying she got it yesterday and felt happy I got it and said she cried. I told her I was happy to hear that. I told he I plan on coming to see her soon. WWE Super Tuesday wasn't on last night. FUCKING BULLSHIT!!! But things turned out better at the end of the night when I caught 3 hours of Charles in Charge. THAT SHOW IS THE FUCKING SHIT!!! I'm also going to watch it tonight. The theme just owns so much.

Today was pretty cool. I got an 85 on my geography exam. I worked my ass off and got myself a descent score. Still gotta finish my speech in Japanese.

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2002-11-11T20:21:00.000-08:00

In other news to quote Big Poppa Pump, "most people are scumbags, and they suck." And I want a chocolate parfe.

2002-11-11T16:46:00.000-08:00

Had my exam. I think I did ok. I also think I did well in my geography exam as well. I fucked up in my math homework the other day. I should still get credit for still trying. Raw is on tonight. Seems cool. Nothing raelly special has been happening at all. Except a lot of thinking. I badly want to finish school and see Japan again. Mostly Fumie. If we were still together we would probably be engaged by now. Anyway, I'll be sending my Host family and Fumie Christmas cards soon as well.

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2002-11-04T17:59:00.000-08:00

I have my math exam tommorow. I studied for it before my english class and all weekend. I will pass. And the next day, I have a geography exam which I will also do well in. I wrote a paper early today in Japanese that I had to do for next Friday. Everyone laughed at me. And last night I was looking at pictures of Fumie before I went to bed. I truly want to see her again.

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2002-11-02T20:54:00.000-08:00

well, i didn't do anything for halloween except watch smackdown. i have an exam in math and geography next week and i will pass this time. even though i haven't studied yet. i go to some gamecube showing tommorow. that seems fun. i hope i pass my classes this semester. i don't get why i'm taking a class during my winter vacaction. during my spring or summer, i should go to japan.

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2002-10-30T16:30:00.000-08:00

JACKED FROM MIKEY!!!!

[ YOU ]
-- Name: Justin Moriarty
-- Birthday: June 24, 1984
-- Birthplace: Omaha, Nebrasak
-- Current Location: Gilbert, AZ
-- Eye Color: Dark Brown
-- Hair Color: brown
-- Righty or Lefty: left
-- Zodiac Sign: cancer
-- Innie or Outtie: innie
-- Religion: Roman Catholic
-- Font: whatever it's on

[ YOUR FAVORITE ]
-- Music: Japanese pop, Japanese rock, some kpop, eurobeat
-- Cartoon: Inuyasha
-- Color: anything dark
-- Slushy Flavor: dont have one
-- Magazine: dont have one
-- TV Show:WWE Monday Night Raw and WWE Smackdown
-- Song(s): Night of Fire by Niko, Speedway by Niko, Space Boy by Dave Rodgers
-- Language: English and Japanese
-- Spice Girl: Japanese Spice
-- Food & Beverage: Coke and Pizza
-- Subject in School: Japanese
-- Weekend Activity: unplanned
-- Ice Cream Flavor: Rocky Road
[ WHAT IS ]
-- Your most overused phrase on AOL or AIM? What the Korea
-- The first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning: just another day
-- The last image/thought you go to sleep with: Fumie-Chan
-- The first feature you notice in the opposite sex: attraction
-- The Best Name for a Butler: Johnny
-- The wussiest sport: soccer
-- Your best feature: that im a live action anime boy
-- Your bedtime: anytime after wrestling
-- Your greatest fear: forever losing fumie
-- Your greatest accomplishment: winning a govt scholarship
-- Your most missed memory: if you miss a memory, you don't rem. it.

[ YOU PREFER? ]
-- Pepsi or Coke: Coke
-- McDonald's or Burger King: BK
-- Single or group dates: Single
-- Adidas or Nike: Vans
-- Chicken nuggets or chicken fingers: Fingers
-- Dogs or cats: Turtles
-- Rugrats or doug: Neither, they both suck now
-- Single or taken: Taken (sort of)
-- Monica or Brandy: BoA!!!!
-- Tupac or Jay-Z: Move
-- Shania Twain or LeAnn Rhymes: AYUMI!!!!
-- Aerosmith or Red Hot Chilli Peppers: X-JAPAN!!!!!
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
-- One pillow or two: 3
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
-- Hot chocolate or hot cocoa: they're the same
-- Cappucino or coffee: coffee
-- Drinks with or without ice cubes: with
-- Boxers or briefs: boxers
-- Give or receive: give

[ DO YOU ]
-- Take a shower everyday? yes
-- Have a [any] crush[es]? yes?
-- Do you think you've been in love? yes
-- Want to go to college? im a freshman at ASU
-- Like high school? hate school, like people
-- Want to get married? yes
-- Type with your fingers on the right keys? yes
-- Believe in yourself? believe in what i am
-- Have any tattoos/where? no
-- Have any piercings/where? nope
-- Get motion sickness? Yeah
-- Think you're a health freak? HAHAHAHA GO monte cristo
-- Get along with your parent[s]: nope
-- Like thunderstorms? not really

[ THE FUTURE ]
-- Age you hope to be married: anywhere between 22 and 35
-- Number and Names of Children: maybe one son or daughter is fine. For a son, maybe Thomas or John. For daughter, probably Petronila (the grandmother i never knew)
-- Where do you see yourself at age 20? still in college
-- Descibe your dream wedding: on the beach and just kissing fumie and telling her how much i want to be with her forever
-- How do you want to die? knowing i was happy doing what i wanted helping someone else
-- What country would you most like to visit? Japan, Korea, or the Philippines

[ OPPOSITE SEX ]
-- Best eye color? brown
-- Best hair color? brown and orange kind of mixed
-- Short or long hair? short
-- Best height? slightly shorter, 5'4 prolly. even though fumie is taller than me
-- Best weight? 105
-- Best articles of clothing? school uniform
-- Best first date location? movie or eating chocolate parfe
-- Best first kiss location? TOKYO TOWER!!!!

[ OTHER ]
-- When's the last time you slept with a stuffed animal? dont know
-- How many rings until you answer the phone? however close i am
-- What's on your mouse pad? not using one
-- How many houses have you lived in? 9
-- How many schools have you gone to? 8
-- What color is your bedroom carpet? gray
-- Would you shave your head for $5000 dollars? sure
-- If you were stranded on a desert island and you could only take three people with you who would you take? Fumie-Chan, my best friend Mike, and any woman he wants

2002-10-25T20:57:00.001-07:00

ok im having trouble with this shit

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2002-10-25T20:57:00.000-07:00

I had my exam in Japanese today. It was easy. I only studied when I was with Kaori-San. I ate at Chuckbox and then went to the comic store then went to my Geography lab class. I have a high B in that class. Then when I came home from school, my parents got a letter from school that I'm doing bad in Geography and told them that with my lab grade so far, I probably have a C and not a D like it says. After that I studied my geography and math and I will do better next time on my exams and pass my classes.

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2002-10-24T15:55:00.000-07:00

i've been meaning to post in this for a while now, but really haven't found time to do so until now. Anyways, I've been happy up and down. Happy down, I got a 40% on my math exam, happy up a 95% on my Japanese exam. I've also watched Ringu last night. It was really scary. I also did my skit in Japanese today with Erin and James and we all had fun. I also have my speaking exam on Tuesday with Merc. My younger brother Darren recentley got some Gamecube games and he's very happy. Well I have piano and I'm also going to watch WWF tonight. Cya.

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2002-10-19T22:14:00.000-07:00

Today was truly the greatest. Mesa Golfland got every anime fan boy and racer's dream, Initial D Arcade Stage. I love the anime and when I heard that SEGA was making a game, I was excited to one day play it. Then I heard California got it and all the players gave it positive reviews. All I can say is that Initial D Arcade Stage is the best game I've played in a while and I will go again sometime next week and keep on playing. I also watched all of I My Me Strawberry Eggs today and it was a terrific series. I even wanted to cry during the ending. Anyway, I also need to start watching Onegai Teacher. After I write this, I'll continue talking with my cousin PJ by MSN and watch WWF.

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2002-10-15T23:07:00.000-07:00

I honestly can't express how I truly feel right now. I just recentley heard that my aunt can't come to the U.S. later this month from the Philippines and my mother was unable to buy tickets to the Philippines for Christmas this year. So I guess that also equals no going to Japan. I was in a pretty good mood for a majority of the day yesterday, and today turns into shit. This morning I took my math exam I studied not too much for but I still studied hard for it. It took me an hour to do, and the questions were fucking confusing and I was 30 minutes late to math class and like 25% of the kids showed up. After all, math is not my best subject. So many people from high school helped me to get here at ASU and I'm not doing good. I have the support, I really want to adjust my attitude to something positive but the way things are now, it's hard for me to focus. I'm still enthusiastic in Japanese class because it's my major and I feel like it's the only class I need to further improve my communications with my former host family the Miyazaki's, Fumie, and Mamiko. I've just been burning I My Me Strawberry Eggs and Hayao Miyazaki movies. Since I have a short day tommorow (hopefully a positive one), maybe I'll get a chance to watch some animes I've had for awhile and finally watch them. I got my Japanese exam next week I believe and I will defenitley pass that no problem.

I'll still give it my shot to do whatever to get my smile back again. Pray that I go to Japan and see everyone later this year.

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2002-10-13T22:59:00.000-07:00

Well, I did not do much today. I pretty much stayed at home all day. I also went through some old toys in the garage and see what I can keep and what we can donate to the Philippines. I've also started watching Spirited Away. I only got a portion of it done and it's awesome so far. It came out when I was in Japan at the time but did not get the chance to watch it. I also watched Grave of the Fireflies, even though I found it sad, it didn't really make me cry. I am now interested in watching I, My, Me! Strawberry Egg. I have also had the entire series of Onegai Teacher for some time now but still have yet to watch it. I may consider collecting Gasaraki next.

Well my mom finished my paper for me. I decided to take my math test on Tuesday even thought it would be better off to do it tommorow morning. I defenitley still need to study.

I recentley heard from my host mother. I heard they have been having festivals recentley but I still haven't translated the e-mail. I also heard from my pen pal Mamiko who has been ready getting ready for college. Well I guess I gotta finish and go to sleep.

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2002-10-12T23:16:00.000-07:00

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From now, I will write this blogger much more in Japanese as I promised. I must practice more in Japanese. I become good at more things such as speaking and listening in Japanese. But thing such as writing and reading I am more bad at. Watching more anime and listening to more J-Pop will increase my skill I believe. I just recentley watched Inuyasha 87 and it was a good anime. I want to watch things such as the movie and play the game. There will be a new DDR game soon. DDR EX. Doesnt it seem a little fun? But I really dont care much about DDR. Right now to become better at Japanese, I must study, Cya.

2002-10-12T23:06:00.000-07:00

Once again this morning I go to the library and do some work and everything is still ok. My brother had his SATs today and when he came home, we all went to best buy and the mall and ate some pizza. Then I played some video games and I've been watching wrestling.

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2002-10-11T22:02:00.000-07:00

I recentley heard from my former host family from Japan. Their eldest son got married to a lovley girl who is also from Hiroshima and they now live in Tokyo. The only brother I got to meet Sou, is now writing a paper for graduation. Everyone seems happy in Japan, but I am not. I went to Anime Club at school today as I waited for my mom. They showed Gasaraki and I was not interested in it at all. Then me and my mom went to my grandma's house and I played with my niec and nephew and got beaten up. Then I came home and played on my playstation 2 and now I am writing my blogger.

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2002-10-11T21:51:00.000-07:00

JACKED FROM CRACKPR0N

Have you ever...
{x} Made out with a friend of the same sex? FOR FAKE!
{x} Fallen for your best friend? No
{x} Been rejected? who hasn't?
{x} Been in love? yes i have...(I really don't fall outta love)
{x} Been in lust? yup
{x} Used someone? everyone uses people...
{x} Been used? and everyone is used.
{x} Cheated on someone? well,..uh...
{x} Been cheated on?i hope not
{x} Done something you regret? yes

Who was the last person...
{x} You touched? dont remember
{x} You talked to? i geuss my brother
{x} You hugged? my niec
{x} You instant messaged? I think Sean
{x} You kissed? my niec and nephew
{x} You yelled at? in real life? my niec .
{x} You laughed with? niec and nephew

Have you/are you/do you....
{x} Considered a life of crime? either the yakuza or a chinese cartel
{x} Considered being a hooker? no
{x} Considered being a pimp? pimpin' aint easy
{x} Are you psycho? yes
{x} Split personalities? to an extent, yes.
{x} Schizophrenic? no
{x} Obsessive Compulsive? nope
{x} Panic? no way
{x} Anxiety? hahahah no
{x} Depression? THINKING IS BAD!
{x} Suicidal? never
{x} Obsessed with hate? hate is abundent, not obsessed though.
{x} Dream of mutilated bodies, blood, death, and gore? yes...
{x} Dream of doing those things instead of just seeing them? yes
{x} Understanding: yes, though it doesn't seem like it... i think.
{x} Open-minded: i see lots of points of views
{x} Arrogant: yes( XD )
{x} Insecure: a little
{x} Interesting: if you think i am
{x} Hungry: not really
{x} Friendly: sure
{x} Smart: how do you know you're smart?
{x} Moody: not really
{x} Childish: i have the heart of a boy
{x} Independent: in mind and in heart... but i'm not financially.
{x} Hard working: i guess
{x} Organized: organization in disorganization
{x} Healthy: yeah
{x} Emotionally Stable: emotionally conflicted
{x} Shy: a little
{x} Difficult: yes
{x} Attractive: i'm a live action anime boy plus young jackie chan
{x} Bored Easily: yes
{x} Thirsty: Always Coca Cola
{x} Responsible: responsible in what way?
{x} Sad: THINKING IS BAD!
{x} Happy: if you think i am ^_^
{x} Trusting: ppl try to take advantage of me
{x} Talkative: sure, though i listen more than talk
{x} Original: ppl steal stuff from me ;_;
{x} Different: am i?
{x} Unique: everyone is aren't they? cept for the sheepies!
{x} Lonely: no
{x} Color your hair? no
{x} Have tattoos? nope
{x} Piercings? nu-uh
{x} Have a boyfriend? never have, never will
{x} Floss daily? nu-uh
{x} Own a webcam? I want one ;_;
{x} Ever get off the damn computer? all the time
{x} Sprechen sie deutsche? huh
{x} Habla espanol? El Nino is spanish for the NIno
{x} En Francaise? no
{x} Current Clothes: red shirt, black pants
{x} Current Mood: THINKING IS BAD GOD DAMN IT!
{x} Current Taste: Saliva
{x} Current Hair: regular cru cut
{x} Current Annoyance: THINKING... yeah you know what i'm gonna say.
{x} Current Smell: the radiation off the monitor
{x} Current thing you ought to be doing: really nothing
{x} Current Desktop Picture: Sesshoumaru from Inuyasha
{x} Current Favorite Group: Morning Musume
{x} Current Book: The Rock Says
{x} Current DVD:any anime
{x} Current Refreshment: Coke
{x} Current Worry: School...
{x} Current Crush: Cheryl Shimata, Kaori Terashima, Fumie Chou
{x} Current Favorite Celebrity: The Rock, Shawn Michaels
{x} Food: pizza
{x} Drink: coke
{x} Color:anything dark
{x} Shoes: Vans
{x} Candy: Snickers
{x} TV Show: WWF Raw and Smackdown
{x} Movie: Spider-Man
{x} Dance: para para of speedway
{x} Anime: Inuyasha
{x} Hentai: La Blue Girl
{x} Video Game: Metal Gear Solid 2 and Gran Turismo 3
{x} Vegetable: brocolli
{x} Fruit: Apple

On Dating....
{x} Long or short hair? doesnt matter
{x} Dark or blond hair? light
{x} Tall or short? shorter than me 5'4 is winner
{x} Mr. Sensitive or Mr. Funny? Mr. innocent
{x} Good girl or bad girl? sweet and innocent
{x} Dark or light eyes? dark
{x} Hat or no hat? it depends
{x} Pierced or no? dont know
{x} Freckles or none? none
{x} Stubble or neatly shaved? wait wait what are we talking about here... ... shaved -=X
{x} Rugged outdoorsy type or sporty type? the jumpy cheery type
{x} Chocolate milk or hot chocolate? choco milk
{x} McDonalds or Burger King? In-N-Out Burger
{x} Marry the perfect lover or the perfect friend? perfect companion
{x} Sweet or sour? sweet
{x} Root Beer or Dr. Pepper? Always Coca-Cola
{x} Sappy/action/comedy/horror? romantic, comedy, action, horror, anime
{x} Cats or dogs? penguins
{x} Ocean or Pool? ocean
{x} Cooler Ranch or Nacho Cheese? dont know
{x} Mud or Jell-O wrestling? Jell-o... black cherry jell-o
{x} With or without ice-cubes? cubies
{x} Shine or rain? shine
{x} Winter/Summer/Fall/Spring? summer
{x} Vanilla or Chocolate? rocky road
{x} Gloves or mittens? neither, i perfer feeling
{x} Eyes open or closed? closed...
{x} Fly or breathe under water? dont know
{x} Bunk-bed or waterbed? by the fire
{x} Chewing gum or hard candy? listerine strips are yummy
{x} Motor boat or sailboat? sail, so peaceful
{x} Lights on or off? off, but a small amount of light(moonlight, light through a window shade) is really nice. I like seeing a smile
{x} Chicken or fish? fishy

What's your favorite:.
{x} Number? none
{x} Holiday? Christmas
{x} Radio station? cd
{x} Place? anywhere i can freely be without being yelled at.
{x} Flower? lily's
{x} Scent? a beautiful girl's hair

???
{x} If you could be anywhere, where would you be? Japan or the Philippines
{x} What would you be doing? being with a beautiful girl
{x} What are you listening to? nothing
{x} Can you do anything freakish with your body? no
{x} Do you have a favorite animal, no matter how lame it may be? penguins

2002-10-10T16:46:00.000-07:00

Anyway, to be honest with you. For the past few months now, I feel as if I have lost my smile. I really don't know why. I really haven't smile a real smile in a while. Maybe it's also effecting my academic ability. I really have been down latley. Maybe lack of interaction with my best friend, my critiscism with my therapy for my brother, not being able to do drawings latley, maybe it's just I miss Fumie still. I don't know what will cheer me up. The last time I was depressed, my trip to Japan really got me on track on where I wanted to be in terms of being happy. I guess maybe if I go again and see everybody there, I guess I'll feel a lot better. I got a few papers to write which I am almost done with, study for next weeks math exam, and so on.

I got piano today where things are always the same. Weird humrous teacher helping me with my anime songs. I still have yet to watch all of Ongeai Teacher, Jin-Roh, Spirited Away, I My Me Strawberry Eggs, and Azumanga Daioh. Damn, college is taking my time away from anime. Video games I still play on the same basis if lucky, and some with the internet. I still enjoy watching Inuyasha which I still download. I still watch Raw and Smackdown which are my only favorite shows. I still watch JAG, Smallville, and I also saw Birds of Prey which I already own.

I'm sick of people like my mom critizing me all the time. It's really starting to piss me off. I try to do whats right, but its hard for me to know what I do sometimes is a mistake and she throws it in my face and Im pissed. I guess lack of human contact with such people like Mike Hosler, Fumie, and some other people is driving me insane.

2002-10-01T17:39:00.000-07:00

I got a 93% on my Japanese exam. Which kicks ass. I got my geography exam tommorow. I just made my review notes and I will study a little later and do the rest of my Japanese homework. My brother Darren started at Desert Ridge High School at East Mesa where my friend lives. They seem to treat him better there and give him a better quality education for students with autism. He pretty much got treated like shit at Gilbert High School. But that's over now.

Just watched Monday Night Raw last night which had a descent show. Love the Wheel of Eric Bischoff. HLA HLA HLA!

I just hope if we got to the Philippines later this year, we can go to Japan too.

2002-09-26T14:06:00.000-07:00

We did our skit today in Japanese class. It turned out ok. I had a lot of fun. I also drew a picture of Sumomo from Chobits during my break at the library. It fucking kicks ass. I got my math exam a couple weeks back recentley, I did all right. And this dude who sits 2 seats from me who is 55 got a 63% and he sweared. Man college is fucking awesome, hard, and weird all at the same time. I got my exam tommorow in Japanese. Guess I'll have some good quality time with Kaori-San tommorow.

I saw my old high school Japanese teacher yesterday. She seems well and we were happy to see each other. That's good so far. I hope to visit her again soon and show my gratitude for helping me get to college. I couldn't go to the APPLES reunion today. Sure sucks a big fat one. I gotta switch to live journel sometime soon.

I also had a dream a couple of nights ago. I dreamed I was Fumie. I came close to her, held her, then kissed. Then I wake up and find in my e-mail box that I got an email from her. That's good.

2002-09-24T19:32:00.000-07:00

Well nothing much happened today. I have a skit project for Japanese class. My partners is Matt Guidi and Cheryl Shimata. Our idea is somewhat funny of what we did for a skit. Hope it turns out good. I got a 100% on my math quiz, I got my exam in geography next week and I will defenitley kick ass on that. I got my APPLES reunion on Thursday. Still not sure whether or not I am going. I might visit my old Japanese teacher at Mesquite High tommorow and surprise her like fucking crazy. My body has been aching latley all over. Fucking sucks a big one.

2002-09-22T09:18:00.000-07:00

because I'm bored
a list of my favorite things and things I own

Favorite Animes-
Video Girl Ai
DNA
Dragon Ball Z
Street Fighter II V
Street Fighter II The Anime Movie
Escaflowne
Initial D
Inuyasha
Ranma 1/2
Nadeisco
Mobile Suit Gundam
Z Gundam
Gundam 08th MS Team
Gundam 0080
Gundam 0083
Char's Counterattack
X TV
X 1999
Sexy Commando Masaru
Chobits
Cowboy Bebop
Crying Freeman
Tiger Mask
Hamtaro
and many others

a list of animes I own-
Chobits (1-25)
Inuyasha (1-85)
Ranma 1/2 (whole season)
Ranma 1/2 Anything Goes Martial Arts (whole season)
Ranma 1/2 Hard Battle (whole season)
Ranma 1/2 The Movie Trouble In Nekonron China
Ranam 1/2 Nihao My Concubine
Ranma 1/2 Movie 3
Ranma 1/2 (all OAVS)
Dragon Ball (some episodes)
Dragon Ball movie 4
Dragon Ball Z (some episodes)
Dragon Ball Z movies (all 13)
Dragon Ball GT (some episodes)
Inuyasha The Love that Transcends Time
Hack Sign (first 8 episodes)
Berserk (whole series)
Slayers (some episodes)
Slayers The Movie
X TV (whole series plus OAV)
X 1999
Onegai Teacher (whole series)
Video Girl Ai (whole series)
DNA (whole series)
Trigun (whole series)
Cowboy Bebop (whole series)
Cowboy Bebop Knockin on Heaven's Door
Mobile Suit Gundam (all 3 movies)
Z Gundam (up to episode 20)
Gundam 0080 (whole series)
Gundam 0083 (whole series)
Gundam 08th MS team (whole series)
Char's Counterattack
Gundam Wing (whole series)
Gundam Wing Endless Waltz
Fatal Fury Legend of the Wolf
Fatal Fury The Battle Continues
Fatal Fury The Motion Picture
Street Fighter II The Anime Movie
Street Fighter II V (whole series)
Street Fighter Zero
Sexy Commando Masaru (first 10 episodes)
Magic Knight Rayearth (first 5 episodes)
DoReMi (an episode)
Initial D (whole season)
Initial D 2nd Stage (whole season)
Initial D 3rd Stage
Initial D Extra Stage
Initial D Exciting Battle Stage
Initial D Battle Stage
Marmalade Boy (whole series)
Marmalade Boy movie
Fushigi Yuugi (whole series)
Fushigi Yuugi OAV
Nadeisco (whole series)
Nadeisco The Movie
Macross Do You Remember Love?
Maison Ikkoku OAV
Cutey Honey Flash (ep 1)
Rurouni Kenshin (up to episode 25)
Rurouni Kenshin OAV (whole series)
Rurouni Kenshin The Movie
Fist of the North Star
Akira
Jin-Roh
Tenchi Muyo In Love
Tenchi Muyo Manatsu No Eve
Tenchi Muyo Haruka Naru Omoi
Samurai Troopers (first 8 episodes)
La Blue Girl (whole series)
Cool Devices (some episodes)
Final Fantasy Legend of the Crystals
Escaflowne (whole series)
Escaflowne Girl in Gaea
Ah! My Goddess (whole series)
Ah! My Goddess The Movie
Hikaru No Go (ep 1)
GTO (intro movie)
Hellsing (all 13 episodes)
Nurse Angel Ririka (first 2 episodes)
Sailor Moon (some episodes)
Sailor Moon R The Movie
Sailor Moon S (some episodes)
Sailor Moon S The Movie
Sailor Moon Super S (some episodes)
Sailor Moon Super S The Movie
Sailor Stars (last few episodes)
Battle Arena Toshinden
Darkstalkers
Wedding Peach (ep 1)

Favorite Anime Characters-
Momonari Junta (DNA)
Aoi Karin (DNA)
Moteuchi Youta, Motenai Youda (Video Girl Ai)
Amano Ai (Video Girl Ai)
Goku (Dragon Ball Z)
Future Trunks (Dragon Ball Z)
Gohan (Dragon Ball Z)
Vegeta (Dragon Ball Z)
Kusanagi (X)
Shirou Kamui (X)
Subaru (X)
Fuma (X)
Takahashi Ryosuke (Initial D)
Takahashi Keisuke (Initial D)
Fujiwara Takumi (Initial D)
Takeuchi Itsuki (Initial D)
Fujiwara Bunta (Initial D)
Nakazato Takeshi (Initial D)
and many others

OK a list of my favorite video games-
Super Mario Bros
Super Mario Bros 3
Super Mario World
Mario 64
Sonic The Hedgehog
Sonic The Hedgehog 2
Sonic Adventure
Sonic Adventure 2
House of the Dead 2
Silent Scope 2
Ragnarok Online
Soul Calibur
Crazy Taxi
Shenmue
Shenmue II
Virtua Fighter 2
Virtua Fighter 3
Virtua Fighter 4
Marvel Vs. Capcom 2
Capcom Vs. SNK 2
Street Fighter Zero 3
Street Fighter 3 2nd Impact
King of Fighters 98
King of Fighters 2000
King of Figheters Kyo
Lunar Silver Star Story
Legend of Zelda The Orcania of Time
Chrono Trigger
Final Fantasy 6
Final Fantasy 7
Final Fantasy 8
WrestleMania 2000
WWF No Mercy
Toukon Retsuden 3
Fire Pro Wrestling 6 Man Scramble
WWF Smackdown Shut Your Mouth
Gran Turismo 3
Metal Gear Solid
Metal Gear Solid 2
Dance Dance Revolution 2nd Mix
Dance Dance Revolution 3rd Mix
Dance Dance Revolution 4th Mix
Dance Dance Revolution 5th Mix
Dance Dance Revolution 7th Mix MAX 2
Para Para Paradise 1st Mix Plus
Para Para Paradise 2nd Mix
Beatmania IIDX 6th Style
Gundam Federation Vs. Zeon
Gundam Blood Of Zeon
Dragon Ball Z Legends
Dragon Ball Z Shinbutouden
Dragon Ball Final Bout
Magic Knight Rayearth
Mocap Boxing
Punch Mania
Jackie Chan's Stunt Master
Gundam Rise From the Ashes

Favorite Actors-
Bruce Lee
Jackie Chan
Gary Daniels
Arnold Schwarzeneggar
Slyvester Stalonne
Charleton Heston
Robert Redford
Robert De Niro
Al Pacino
Michael Keaton
Adam Sandler
Chris Farley
Will Smith
Wesley Snipes
Dante Basco

Favorite Movies-
City Hunter
Gorgeous
Rush Hour
Rush Hour 2
Shanghai Noon
Police Story
Billy Madison
Mr. Deeds
Big Daddy
Little Nicky
Tommy Boy
Black Sheep
Beverly Hills Ninja
Fist of Legend
Collateral Damage
Terminator 2
Rambo Trilogy
All 5 Rocky movies
Driven
Fist of the North Star
Hook
Power Rangers The Movie

Favorite TV shows-
WWE Raw
WWE Smackdown
WWE Velocity
WWE Confidential
WWE Heat

Favorite Sports-
Pro Wrestling
Puroresu (Japanese Pro Wrestling)
Baseball

Favorite Baseball Teams-
Arizona Diamondbacks
Seattle Mariners
LA Dodgers
Anahiem Angels
New York Yankees
Boston Red Sox
Chicago Cubs
San Francisco Giants
Oakland A's

Favorite Baseball players-
Babe Ruth
Joe DiMaggio
Hank Aaron
Sou Miyazaki (like a brother to me)
Ichiro Suzuki
Joe Diaz
Randy Johnson
Curt Schilling
Barry Bonds

Favorite Pro Wrestlers-
Hulk Hogan (born on the day of Hulkamania)
Macho Man Randy Savage
Kevin Nash
Scott Hall
Triple H
Shawn Michaels (My favorite wrestler of all time)
Rob Van Dam (THE WHOLE FUCKING SHOW)
Vader
Mick Foley
Rey Mysterio, Jr.
Juventud Gurrera
Booker T
Undertaker
Kurt Angle
D'Lo Brown
Jushin Thunder Lyger
The Great Muta
Yoshiro Tajiri
Antonio Inoki
Ultimo Dragon
Taka Michinoku
Tiger Mask
Tiger Mask III
Tiger Mask IV
Giant Baba
Stan Hansen
Scott Norton
The Ultimate Warrior
The Million Dollar Man
The Rock
Stone Cold Steve Austin
Bret Hart
Owen Hart
Andre the Giant
Bubba Ray Dudley
D-Von Dudley
The Hurricane
Terry Funk
The Godfather (GET ON THE HOOOOOOOOOOOOO TRAIN)
Big Poppa Pump (I'M A GENETIC FREAK)
Chris Jericho
Bam Bam Bigelow

Hated Wrestlers of All Time-
X-Pac
Christian
Sean Stasiak
Stevie Richards
Vince McMahon (doesnt know jack shit what the fans want anymore)
Stephanie McMahon (I cant stand how she talks)
Brock Lesnar (The Next Big Bitch and got beat by Kurt Angle in a real wrestling match in a 1min 15sec)
Goldberg (He only had 2 moves)
Hugh Morris
Buff Bagwell
Sting (stole Bret Hart's move)
Billy and Chuck (homos)
Ric Flair (THE 16 TIME LOOOOOOOOSER)
Raven
The New Undertaker
Sexual Chocolate (he said fuck you to my face)
David Flair

Favorite Matches of All Time-
Juventud Gerrera Vs Rey Mysterio, Jr. (WCW Thunder sometime in 98 or 99)
The Rock Vs. Mankind (Royal Rumber 1999, I Quit Match)
Hulk Hogan Vs. Ultimate Warrior (WrestleMania 6)
Shawn Michaels Vs. Bret Hart (WrestleMania XI, Iron Man Match)
Mick Foley Vs. Some Psycho Japanese due in a hardcore match in Japan
Booker T Vs. Test (last monday night on Raw)
Undertaker Vs. Mankind (Hell in A Cell, King of the Ring 1999)
Hulk Hogan Vs. Andre the Giant (WrestleMania III)
The Rock Vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin (WrestleMania 17)
Stone Cold Steve Austin Vs. Bret Hart (WrestleMania 12)

Women I have Loved-
Christine
Mai Bautista
Mika Yoshikawa
Fumie Chou
Megumi Ohta
Miki Watari
Yui Fujimoto
Lily McGuire
Cheryl Shimata
Kaori Terashima
Justina Tam
Nozomi Tanaka

Women That Have Loved Me-
Lily McGuire
Miki Watari
Mika Yoshikawa
Mai Bautista
Megumi Ohta
Fumie Chou
Yui Fujimoto
Yui Matsusaka (an 8 year old girl)

Women I have had Sex with-
Lily McGuire
Miki Watari
Yui Fujimoto
Fumie Chou
Megumi Ohta

Countires I have been to-
Canada
Mexico
The Philippines
Guam
Japan
Korea
Taiwan
France
Italy
Switzerland
Spain

Other states I've been to-
Washington
Alaska
Hawaii
Oregon
California
Arizona
New Mexico
Colorado
Utah
Wyoming
Lousiana
New York
South Dakota
Oklahoma
Kansas

Places I lived-
Gilbert, AZ
Tempe, AZ
Omaha, NB
Seattle, WA
Sunnyvale, CA
Moutain View, CA
Clark Air Base, Philippines
Seoul, Korea
Hiroshima, Japan

Schools I have been to-
Montaloma Elementary School
Therakauf Elementary School
Houston Elementary School
Mita Elementary School
Gilbert Jr. High School
Gilbert High School/Mequite High School/Rio Sallado Community College
Koyo High School
Arizona State University

Favortie Music-
Eurobeat
J-Eurobeat
J-Rock
J-Pop
K-Pop

Favorite Artists-
BoA
H.O.T.
Kiss (a kpop group)
Dream
Ayumi Hamasaki
L'Arc~En~Ciel
Key A Kiss
MOVE
Morning Musume
Folder 5
X Japan
Dave Rodgers
Lou Grant
Domino
Niko
Shinhwa
Park Ji Yoon
Aaron Kwok

Favorite songs-
Night of Fire (Niko, Japanese version done by Dream)
Speedway (Niko)
Space Boy (Dave Rodgers)
Lets Go To The Show (Dave Rodgers)
Yesterday (Cherry)
Amazing Kiss (BoA)
Valenti (BoA)
Listen to My Heart (BoA)
Waiting (BoA)
No. 1 (BoA)
Every Heart (BoA)
We Are The Future (H.O.T.)
Hey Come Over (Shinhwa)
All You Dreams (Shinhwa)
Because I'm A Girl (Kiss)
Forever Love (X Japan)
Weekend (X Japan)
Dahlia (X Japan)
Final Fun Boy (Folder 5)
Love Machine (Morning Musume)
Manatsu No Kousen (Morning Musume)
Morning Coffee (Morning Musume)
Dance Dance (Mornign Musume)
Wish (Morning Musume)
The Peace (Morning Musume)
Renai Revolution (Morning Musume)
Afurechau Be In Love (Morning Musume's Maki Goto)
My Dearest (Ayumi Hamasaki)
Depend on You (Ayumi Hamasaki)
Love ~Destiny (Ayumi Hamasaki)
Private War (Dream)
My Will (Dream)
Fukai Mori (Do As Infinity)

2002-09-20T22:26:00.000-07:00

Sorry I got a little mistake with the name of my tutor's name. Her name is Kaori, not Saori. Kaori Terashima. She's cute and very funny. I'm happy I can make her laugh like I can with most girls. I think she's starting to get suspicious of my 1337 Japanese skills. Maybe things can work out slowly between us if I plan this out right. I got some exam coming up next week in Japanese, and some exam coming sometime around in Geography. And in English we are grading each other's rough drafts.

Fucking bullshit is my youngest brother suspended from school. He's autistic for the love of god and they are suspending him for running into someone and the kid ends up hurt. How the fuck do the jabroni ass clowns that suspend him get into power in the fucking first place? I think it is unfair they are suspending him. I hope that school gets hit by a plane. Anyways, my parents think it's a bunch of monkey shit too and they plan on moving him to a better school which will be more fair with him. Anyways, I hope Darren the best of luck in his new school and that any ass clowns won fuck with him.

I've been playing Wrestlemania 2000 on my Nintendo 64 recentley. Just a kick ass game I owned for the past 2 years and is still fun.

Pray that I get Kaori-San.

2002-09-17T21:57:00.000-07:00

Still have yet to hear for a conversation partner for Japanese practice. Well good news is, even though I don't need one, I got a tutor for Japanese class. Hearing her name was Saori and assuming she was female, I only signed up out of curiosity of what type of person she was. She was one hell of a babe and very nice. We seem to be getting along fine. We plan on meeting every Friday. Hopefully i can get some relationship started with her.

I finally finished watching the entire X series. Totally different from the movie, but still totally sad. I am still collection Chobits and Inuyasha as they still continue in Japan. Chobits I defenitley reccomend. JUST FUCKING WATCH IT!!! My brother rented WWF Smackdown Just Bring It on PS2. If you're a wrestling fan, you'll know this game kicks ass. I can't wait for Shut Your Mouth later this year. Speaking of wrestling, RAW was pretty descent last night. I just found it funny how Rico got a clean win on Ric Flair. Man wrestling is just getting lower and lower. I've been a fan of it for 14 years now and I can't believe where it's going.

I also downloaded the Crow. It's a fucking awesome movie. Sucks that Brandon Lee had to die. He never wanted to be remembered just as the son of the Dragon. I remember him as a total bad ass.

Well giving up on Sheryl hasn't effected me at all. We're still cool. I guess we weren't meant to be after all.

2002-09-10T19:54:00.000-07:00

What's up again it's me. Let me go back to Saturday what happened on what happened at the party in more in depth detail. Started out some friends, and we did a whole lot of shit. We played crossfire, crazy taxi, jojo, and kof2. Then we watched the return of the incredible hulk and transformers. kick ass, huh? I also recentley got some X TV series episodes downloaded and almost have the entire sereis. I have all of Onegai Teacher and I also got City Hunter. Kick ass.

I recentley signed up in my Japanese class to have a conversation partner. Some kids in my class got their info on theris. but i haven't gotten mine yet. wong-sensei says i may get a female one. i say kick ass if i get a pretty one soon. i don't care. but to be honest, i want a 16 or 17 year old japanese girl friend now. Maybe it's Fumie who I still need afterall.

SST also closed down and I want to get into that. I knew the day would come. It was only around for over a year. I met some of the greatest people on that board and Depth and Toki gave me a place in h2o. I'm still part of h2o no matter what still. It use to be the greatest board for Arizona players. DDR'izona started out great, but it turned to a board for DDRFreak rejects where they can legally flame each other, and the other ass clowns post at that godforsaken DDRFreak. SST had cool people and they knew what bemani was and what a real team meant. I remember I first posted was before and during my trip to Japan last year. We shortley met after SST started, and before I head to Japan. I mean, it was the day the Mesa and Tucson area united. After that, SST kicked ass. Then it got gay when some DDRFreak ass clowns came to the board and fucked shit up and then SST shortly dies later. I'm not upset. We can all still talk.

2002-09-08T13:36:00.000-07:00

Well, things have been going good for me so far I guess. Yesterday was my brother's birthday party. We had a fun time. Got some KOF2K and Transformers S1 DVD set. All kicks ass for reals. Watched Chobits blah blah blah.

2002-08-31T17:50:00.000-07:00

1) Handles: RyoHazuki84, Mirai Trunks 2000, ParaParaJMo, Initial J
2) Birthdate: 6/24/84
3) So that means you're how old?: 18
4) Hobbies: Para Para, anime, manga, Japanese girls
5) Pets: none
6) Do you have a roommate?: if you count family
7) How are you: ok, i guess
8) Would you ever eat sushi?: every now and then
9) Would you ever eat sushi off a naked body?: a hot japanese girl yes
10) Have you considered homosexuality?: No
11) What's your sexual preference?: Japanese teenage girls
12) What were you in a past life?: A ninja
13) I punch you. Quick, what do you do?: Kick you in the balls
14) What's your favorite coffee?: hot
15) What's your political perspective?: conservative
16) Are you an Angel?: I was once
17) Do you consider yourself a poet?: no, but i think like one
18) What do you wanna be when you grow up?: Best english teacher in Japan
19) There's a naked man in your living room. What do you do?: It's me
20) How stupid do you think you are?: i'm not stupid, just uncaring
21) How stupid do other people think you are?: A lot of ppl think i'm an idiot because they don't agree with me even though i've proven them wrong
22) Who the hell do you think you are?: The Heartbreak kid
23) If you could levitate, who would you scare first?: All the fags I hated in Jr. High, maybe Joe Lieberman
24) Can you feel the love tonight?: No
25) On a nude beach, you would...?: screw my woman
25) How many personalities do you have?: never bothered counting
26) Can you do a cartwheel?: but it sucks a whole lot
27) Do you have contact lenses?: no
28) Do you snore?: no
29) Do you drool in your sleep?: no
30) Do you lick your envelopes or use a sponge?: i lick
31) Do you keep a journal?: blog
32) Do you like cotton candy?: its good
33) Do you like to dance?: if i could
34) Do you like to sing?: i like to, doesn't mean i'm good
35) Are you any good at it?: no.
36) Do you like where you live?: yup, its all right
37) Are you organized?: sorta... no
38) Do you sleep with socks on?: nope, get in the way
39) Are you shy?: i'm trying to overcome it
40) Do you talk to yourself?: occasionally
41) Are you a morning person?: hell no
42) Are you a virgin?: Nope
43) Where do you wanna go?: Tokyo

Ever...
44) Been kissed?: yup
45) Been on stage?: many times
46) Dumped someone else?: yeah
47) Gotten in a car accident?: yes, minor one earlier this year
48) Been in love?: yes... hardest thing i've ever been through

Either/Or..
49) Coffee or hot chocolate?: coffee choco
50) Big or little?: medium
51) Lace or satin?: Satin feels nicer
52) New or old?: new
53) Jeans or cords?: Jeans forever
54) Sweater or sweatshirt? sweater
55) T-shirt or tank top?: tshirt
56) Skirt or dress?: skirts are cute
57) Rose or Lily?: lily
58) Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: looking for a japanese one
59) Do you have a best friend?: yes

In the last 24 hours, have you...
60) Cried?: almost
61) Helped someone?: yeah
62) Bought something?: nothing
63) Gotten sick?: yeah
64) Gone to the movies?: nothing to see
65) Gone out for dinner?: no
66) Written a real letter?: no
67) Talked to someone you have a crush on?: yeah
68) Had a serious talk?: yeah i have
69) Missed someone?: yeah
70) Hugged someone?: nope
71) Fought with a friend?: no

Do you.....
72) Wear eye shadow?: no.
73) Put on a "front"?: nope
74) Kiss on the first date?: i have, but that's her fault
75) Have a crush on someone?: kinda
76) When's the last time you showered?: this mornin
77) Are you tired?: kinda
78) Are you lonely?: one is always lonely
79) Are you happy?: yeah i am at the moment
80) Are you wearing pajamas?: Boxers forever
81) Are you talking to someone online?: a few ppl actually
82) What are the initials of your crush/interest/spouse?: Well I like two girls right now, one is SS and the other is JR
83) Describe your ideal significant other: cute, kinda, innocent, faithful, funny, smart, etc.
84) Describe your ideal date: i guess holding hands and cuddling under the stars
85) Sweetest thing that special someone has ever done for you: saying they loved me
86) Have you ever skinny dipped?: uh......
87) If so, been caught?:
88) Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: yes
89) Have you ever been intoxicated?: hahahahahahha
90) Favorite place to be kissed?: lips
91) Have you ever been caught "doing something?": caught? i don't think i was?
92) Are you a tease?: sorta
93) Gender of choice: females
94) Long or short hair?: depends on the face
95) Dark or light hair?: light
96) Eye color: brown and blue
97) Short or tall?: shorter
98) Sensitive or Funny?: both
99) Good or bad?: innocent
100) Piercings?: up to them
101) Cologne: none
102) Tan or fair?: tan i guess
103) Outdoorsy or indoorsy?: both
104) Feature you notice first: cuteness

Are you a...
105) Wuss: no
106) Daydreamer: all the time.
107) Alcoholic: male lush
108) Freak: am I?
109) Dork: n'ah
110) Bitch/Asshole: of course i'm an asshole
111) Brat: no
112) Sarcastic: a lot
113) Goody-goody: no way
114) Angel: read earlier
115) Devil: devilish angel?
116) Horny: occasionally, right now.... sorta
117) Friend: friendly to good friends
118) Shy: no way why are questions repeating?
119) Talkative: i perfer to listen
120) Adventurous: sure why not?
121) Joker: yessum
122) Pimp/Playa: na'h
123) Call-girl: yes? HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH no not really
124) Sporty: no
125) Intelligent: i suppose

Word association:
126) Sex: amusing
127) Rubber gloves: squeeky
128) Rock: Shine Knuckle
129) Green: PEace
130) Wet: nekkedness
131) Cry: taco
132) Peanut: penis
133) Hot: spoon
134) Cold: snack
135) Steamy: taco
136) Fast: food
137) Freaky: nature
138) Rain: Gonads
139) Bite: off
140) Suck: nacho
141) Blow: gun
142) Hard: penis XD
143) Extra long: gum
144) Limp: Penis
145) Needle: man
146) Honey: pot

2002-08-29T17:14:00.000-07:00

Well, my week has been pretty descent so far. I started my fall classes at Arizona State Unviersity. I'm taking Geography, Japanese, Math, and English. Monday was pretty good until I got a fucking parking ticket and had to pay $20. Then on Wednesday I had to park so fucking far I was late to class. I was late again, but it was defenitley my bad. Sheryl is in my Japanese and English classes. We haven't really talked that much so far. She seems ok. My Geography teacher is from Delaware and he played baseball. He's a pretty cool guy. My Japanese teacher is some old white lady. My Math teacher is some Arabian guy. My English teacher seems like some sort of other English teacher.

Today I met a new girl named Jessica Rhuter. She is bi-racial (half white, half asian) like me. She's soooo beautiful. She's a 3rd year college student. She sat next to me and I helped with everything. I enjoyed looking at her smile. Well, I'll continue day dreaming about Jessica.

2002-08-22T10:45:00.000-07:00

I may move to live journal. I just got bored with this blog I guess. Anyway, I started watching Inuyasha Monday. I have up to episodes 81 and the movie. I just finished episode 47. It's a kick ass anime and one of Takahashi's greatest works since Ranma 1/2. I start school Monday and I got all my books and it kicks ass. I got some kick ass para para videos. Anyway, I use te word kick ass too much. Then again it does relate to the title of this gay blog. Anyway, I'll try this for a year period and move to live journal I guess. I don't know why.

2002-08-14T19:30:00.000-07:00

First off, I don't know who reads this and who not, I really haven't been updating lately, and I know. Maybe because I keep my private life to myself more often. I've only given a link to like 2 or 3 people. That's all. Anyway, I got an A on my summer college class and I start 2 weeks from now for my Fall class. I'll give you more of an update what's been happening lately later.

2002-08-05T05:51:00.000-07:00

I got done with my college courses. My grade has yet to be posted. Anyway Friday we went to the ending banquet. Had a great time seeing everyone probably for the last time or probably we wont see each other in a while. After that I went to Nate's birthday party and played some Unreal Tournament and he burned me the GTO drama. episodes 1-9. It's the total shit and the best drama I've seen since Majo no Joken. I lost the powerball big time this week and it sucks a whole lot. And then I went to Atomic Comics Saturday and bought Initial D Vol 2 and disgracing myself with the shitty ass American version. I started my job. it's going to rule. um...what else, oh yeah it's also my brothers birthday tommorow. Aren't I kicking ass in life now?

2002-08-01T17:08:00.000-07:00

Well, I finished my summer college classes. It's really depressing. I've enjoyed the class so much. But it has prepared me for the real thing later this month. I got my friend's birthday party tommorow and I got him a Ragnarok manga. He is a big fan of the game. I won $7 with my second powerball ticket last week. But I didn't win last nights. Gay as fuck. I almost got into an accident yesterday, and some faggot almost ran into my house yesterday with his shitty ass cadallac. Lets pray I win the powerball. Well I'll buy another ticket along the line and hope I win my big dash of dough and get myself a traditional Japanese house. It will own for real.

I've also been having sleeping problems. I wake up past like midnight and cant sleep for an hour and its giving me shit for real. I hope to see my Tucson friends soon I bet. It's gonna kick ass I hope. Well I got a lot to say but got to cut short.

2002-07-25T16:39:00.000-07:00

sorry its just my blog cant work well right now

2002-07-16T21:43:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm still thinking about going back to Hiroshima still. But the only difference is, it costs thousands of dollars for me and it's on my ass. So I'll try to look for some scholarships that can help me. I really want to meet my pen pal Mamiko and find out more what she is like in real life. She seems like a nice and cute girl. College is still treating me nice. I plan on calling Mika soon and see how she is doing. I bought my first Powerball ticket and I only got the first number. As I am saying nowadays, it's a start. I also got Metal Gear Solid 2. Kick ass game. I also rented Turn A Gundam. Really good anime so far. I want to see the rest.

You know what? I don't know really. I'm do desperate for someone's love now and I wish I could be like 25 now. My friend Kawena jokes around saying she wishes she could be younger again. I don't I really want this done. I want to find my right life, meet some right friends, and meet the right woman. I'm so desperate to make my life, my way. I honestly do. I just wish I could just have the life I want. I want to make people laugh, cry with someone, and make someone feel loved and be loved. I still need to do some assignment for APPLES (Academic Program Promotin Leadership Enrichment Servcies, aka UNI 100). Like an e-mail assignment on time managment and myself as a person of society.

2002-07-10T19:29:00.000-07:00

Well, I've been doing a lot of thinking latley. I want to study abroad next year in Hiroshima. I guess I got the opportunity again and see everyone I hope to see. This is what I need more than anything in the world right now. Not only will this be a summer, it's a whole academic year. Even though it's for studying purposes, to me this is the vacation I need. The only differene, it's college, i'm on my own, and no girls in uniform. Anyway, I think I can enjoy life again next year if I do it. I talked to the couselor and I told him of my previous expereinces and how I enjoyed it and how I would want to do it again. Whats cool was that he knew someone from YFU so it's a good start. The guy said I have a good chance and he appreciates me enthusiasm. I defenitley should give this a shot. This is reliving life again at a new level. Plus I know people in Hiroshima. I should do this. I know deep down in my heart I have to do this. This is my life I'm talking here. I don't care how much it takes. In the end, life is a priceless thing and I deserve the life I want and aspire the goals I want to have accomplished. Plus, I'm sick of putting up with shit here. I should move on and do this. THIS IS MY LIFE AND I WONT HAVE IT TAKEN AWAY FROM ME AND I WILL MAKE DECISIONS I WILL NEVER REGRET!!!

2002-07-08T21:46:00.000-07:00

Well I recentley started college. And so far it's been good. I have no stories yet but I will get to the girl Mika. When I was 10, I went through a lot of shit at school and at home. My classmates were shitheads, my teacher was I dont know, and just didnt get along with my family. The first time I met this 14 year old girl from Japan was at the mall playing Street Fighter Alpha. We put up an equal match, but she still won in the end. She then thought I was very good and I was the first person to ever give her a real challenge at it. She was very beautiful, kind, sweet, smart, talented. Everything I see in a girl is because of her. Before I had Mai, Mika was the one there for me. Whenever we had a bad day at that time, we'd always come to each other. I even ditch school sometimes so we could be together. I remember after a month of knowing each other (I believe it was November we first met), we started holding hands while we walked with each other. I felt funny at first and everyone looked at us kind of weird. After awhile, I started liking it. I then started developing weird feelings for her I couldn't understand, then I knew it was love. Around March at the beginning of Spring, I bought this heart shaped ring. It looked like it was $3000 but it was like $10. I then bought it for her and later on that night at the park, I gave it to her and I told her my true feelings and I told her to marry me. She laughed and cried at the sametime, I didn't understand at the time and I thought I got her mad. She then hugged and she gave me my first kiss. It was so weird. She then told me I was a really nice guy and I was cute too. She said it's not right for a guy like me to be after girls at my age. Plus, I haven't even reached puberty yet. But she said she will wait for me. We spent the rest of that year until July just having fun the way we normally did. I taught her martial arts, she would teach me some japanese, and then kick some ass at Street Fighter Zero. On my birthday that night on the day of June 24, 1996, she told me she doesn't really get along with her family and that's why she came to America. She said she was greatful that she met me the most. But she wish I were a bit older, but she says that can wait.

After that, we still kept on contact and kept on seeing each other at least once a year until a couple of years ago. I called her when I was in Tokyo last year and she seemed fine. And recentley on my birthday, I called her and she said she kind of had a disconnection with her family. They made her date some guy a few months ago and he was cheating on her with a few teenage girls and paying them. She knew he was a creep to begin with but she never thought he was that low. And she's pissed at her parents for making her date such a jerk that she disconnected with them. She then says she doesn't feel anymore different because she then finally admits that she has loved me this whole time and says she still wears the engagment ring I gave her. I told her she is not like that guy because she loves me for who i am and accepts me for it. He just wanted those girls so he could feel all cool and high and mighty. Mika is not like that. She is pure at heart and beauty in both soul and body.

Too bad we were never officailly a couple though. Maybe I should marry her one day or something. We owe each other that much. Until then see you next time.

2002-06-24T15:54:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm 18 today. On my party I got Gundam: Federation Vs. Zeon, GTO anime, Ronin Warriors, Origin, GT3, Bible, money, and clothes. And this morning my mom gives me this shit about my behavior and why I don't have friends and why I should have religon in my life etc, etc and she starts crying just to give her sympathy and how I should study and forget about girls and all that stuff and take care of my brother. And talks about how life is about I shoudl study and take care of my brother and thats why 18 is being about. I should fucking slap her in the face. It's her fault in the first place I use to have trouble making friends. She keeps me in the house. Then she blows me off on how i watch TV and do computer and video games all day. Hey, I'm kept in the house so what the fuck am I suppose to do? I feel like throwing it to her face sometimes. But I've had enough back talking at her. I should just tell her how I really feel about her and life. I cherish the present (no wait the present sucks) and living life to the fullest. That's what life is about. When I move out, i won't care about my family anymore. And she gives me shit about the way I dressed and behaved in Japan.

You know what mom you stupid bitch, I dont care if you thought I goofed off and did what. I was being myself for the first time and I was happy. It was the only time I ever learned how to cherish the present and live life. I met great people. You don't know me. It's her fault. My dad is right. She only thinks about herself. She doesn't know how to have fun or anything. To her life is about making money and getting the fuck out of the Philippines with some random American and then learning he's a bum and his family is white trash. I want to decide my own life. Get my own wife, decide my path and everything. And I have. I never want to see my family again if they are going to give me this bullshit. I've always been treated like a kid and I'm sick of it.

I wish I was born into the family of my alternate family in Japan. I was actually happy living life to its fullest. It was so fun and great. I wish I could of been born as my "japanese alter ego." things would of been better.

i also called my first crush last night mika. i missed her so much. i knew her when i was 10 and she was 14. i'll explain how we met later and what our relationship was like. for now, i gotta take a huge ass shit.

2002-06-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

I had to personally call Mike and Sheryl again since those 2 fools would not call me back. Mike has been busy with work and shit and I think so has Sheryl. Mike says he'll be able to be at my party today, and Sheryl can not because she is supposbly going out of town. Good news is after 3 months, Fumie-Chan has finally e-mailed me back. Things have been good with her. She is going to Australia around August. If things go well between us again, maybe I'll give up on Sheryl. I don't know. But anyway, today is my birthday party. And I am at the library right now typing this up. I don't have a lot of privacy to type this at home that much. I start college soon and Ii'm looking for a good job right now. I recentley started watching GTO drama and it's been making me think. Maybe I should be a teacher. All my life I've hated school because of what I had to go through, and I guess I don't want others to go through what I had to. Super strict parents, not a lot of friends, trouble with the kind of women I met.

The only time I ever loved every minute of school was defenitley Japan. People aren't shitheads at that school, cool teachers, uniforms, peace, and quiet. I'm not trying to diss anything, it's just I know what I want and can distinguish it. I really want to teach in Japan. I really loved it there and I found something there that made me happy. I hope to go back sometime soon helping out in my education. Things will be cool soon I hope with Fumie talking to me again, becoming an adult, and starting college.

2002-06-18T00:16:00.000-07:00

Mike and Sheryl have not called me back yet. My mom is giving me shit they aint being true friends. If they're busy, at least let me know. But I'll call Mike later this morning and call Sheryl tommorow night. I forgot to give her old man directions to my house. Plus, my mom is being a complete shit head. I'm on the computer just watching a movie (nothing bad) at 2 in the morning and she comes in and yells at me saying no computer for a week. Do I listen? This is gay, fuck her. This is bull shit. Not like I was doing anything bad. But anyway, I'm sick of her shit. If I could go out the door, I would.

2002-06-16T09:30:00.000-07:00

Mike and Sheryl still have not called back yet. They better call back by Wednesday or so, or I will be pissed. I need to see them again soon. I went to my Aunt, Uncles, and cousins new house yesterday. Moving in party and my grandma's surprise birthday party. Pretty nice house and great food. My aunt Brenda from Texas is here. Everytime she comes, she looks younger and younger. Still have not watched Inu-Yasha even though I have majority of the series. I've also been trying to get Crying Freeman and China Strike Force. I also got Initial D Battle Stage and it's all right. I've been mastering Virtua Fighter 4 as well. I've also been doing some Para Para as usual. I still need a modchip for my PS2 so I can get DDR Max and PPP. My brother Derrick, got some movies like Undercover Brother on his computer. Need to play more bemani, get my Japanese girlfriend(Sheryl), and set off my life.

I also finished watching Gundam 0083 recentley. It kicks ass. I finally got the un-cut Street Fighter II Movie anime, also kicks ass. Need to see Powerpuff Girls movie.

2002-06-15T01:53:00.000-07:00

Saw Undercover Brother. More comedy than gold. Birthday party coming up for me on the 22nd. Tried to call Mike and Sheryl, but they weren't home. So I left a message and invited them.

2002-06-09T02:19:00.000-07:00

Get some training donw. And my birthday is coming up. Nothing really new and important recentley. Don't be surprised if I'm not gonig to update this anytime soon.

2002-06-02T22:12:00.000-07:00

Well my birthday will be up in a few weeks. Nothing much happening. Rented Metal Gear Solid 2 and beat it in 2 days. Took me 10 hours to beat the game. The game fucking owns. It's just I didn't like Raiden. Just emailing my cousin in the Philippines and all. Just needed to keep this updated.

2002-05-29T07:05:00.000-07:00

Been playing some PSOne games on my PS2 recentley and they look pretty sweet. Especailly Metal Gear Solid. I can't wait to get 2 somewhere along the line. Well looks like I'm going to go through a spiritual change. I'm going to study Jeet Kune Do. The style with no style. The style to express oneself. I was a 1st Degree Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do but it didn't give me what I felt like I wanted. When it comes to stuff like Korean way of fighting, or Japanese way of fighting, there are too many limits. In Jeet Kune Do, you set the limits. Bruce Lee has become one of my inspirations in my life. Be honest with yourself, know yourself.

His fighting style does make sense. Especailly when he compares being like water. It can fit into any container, but still powerful enough to destroy rocks. Be like water. When you put water into the cup, it becomes the cup. When you put it into the bottle, it becomes the bottle. When you put it into the teapot, it becomes the teapot. It can flow or it can crush. And on one side you have nartual instinct and the other, and control. You are to combine the two together. If you have one on one side, it would be unscientific, and the other a mechanical man.

I no longer believe in styles anymore. We are all an individual. Jeet Kune Do is not a way to fight, it's a way of life.

Bruce Lee, he was the Dragon God. May his 2nd coming save us all.

2002-05-27T19:10:00.000-07:00

Got my Playstation 2 along with Virtua Fighter 4 and $875 of graduation money. Also got some cool flashy clothes and Initial D 2nd Stage on DVD. Not many people showed up to my graduation party though. I could understand since they had their own shit going on, too. I also had to type of my resume last night and give it to gamezone. I mostly put down I was fluent in Japanese, 1st Degree Tae Kwon Do black belt, involed in this and that, etc. I hope they call me within the day and give me a fucking job. I don't want to be forced in the house all day long like any other summer and do nothing. I just wished I could of gone to Japan again. I hope by the end of this summer, I hope to have a great birthday, a job, and Sheryl.

2002-05-23T10:21:00.000-07:00

Saw Attack of the Clones yesterday. It was pretty good. I thought Hayden was a horrible actor. The anger portrayal was pretty good. The action was good but way too short. Yoda sure kicked ass. It was pretty much an ok movie. Better than episode 1, but not as good as the original Star Wars movies. But hell, after seeing the movie. I can relate a lot to Anakin. I'm disobedient, arrogant, and pretty much I'm just a lot like him. A lost boy in love who cant but wants to anyway. Pretty much everything you see Anakin is pretty much me except the horrible acting. But I can fight better than him I bet :p. I got some Z Gundam episodes. Haven't really watched much though. I'm quickly filling up 70GB within 2 weeks by using up 20GB already. Heh. I gotta load the burning program ASAP.

I called Sheryl last night. She was happy I was called. She picked up her grandmother from Hawaii. She seems happy right now. I told her what's going on with my life yadda yadda yadda. She felt sorry and happy for me in the parts neccessary. I tried to invite her but she got her own thing going on. But I told her I would call her again tommorow. I intend on playing Tuxedo Mirage and Single Bed for her on the piano. Now that I have a suspended license for the rest of my summer vacation, my intentions for dating with her are now somewhat slown down.

Well I graduate tonight and I'm happy!!!

2002-05-22T02:02:00.000-07:00

I intend to call Sheryl if I don't chicken and choke. My mom told me not into invite her, but I'll do it anyway if I have the courage to. School is now over for me and I graduate tommorow. Man I can't wait. It's going to be great. I guess I got more time for the internet and all that crap now if I want to. I went to my old Japanese class for a party. We just all hung out and have cake and watched the Yatta video. Everybody loved it. We should of watched Sexy Commando Masaru. Also we talked about a girl I use to like. Tanaka-Sensei. I heard she kicked ass in a speech contest. Anyway, Mike is all talking about how he liked her and I have to shut up him buy saying I was the one who tried to ask her out. Anyway, I still miss a lot of people. Mai, Fumie-Chan, Sheryl and a whole bunch of other people.

2002-05-20T21:06:00.000-07:00

Nothing much is happening. Just collecting BoA pics, videos, and mp3s. Man she is pretty hot, good dancer, and an excellent singer for a 14 year old Korean girl. I really like her song No. 1. It's got me hooked. I like the beat and the lyrics. School is almost over soon. I guess I do feel some happiness going on. I also got to watch episodes 9-11 of Majo No Joken. A Japanese Drama I've been looking for for a year and never saw it in Japan either. All I can say is that I really want to see the first few episodes of the series. It really touched me in some areas. I'm also getting Escaflowne, Z Gundam, Gundam 0083, Inu Yasha, and DNA. Among my favorite animes.

I'm getting my PS2 with Virtua Fighter 4 this Saturday. I'm super excited as hell to open it up. I really want to enjoy my life. I hope it turns out great. Lots of shit has still been pissing me off latley. But I can still manage. As long as I got my BoA music and my piano I'm happy. Now time for a simple rant.

Everytime I find something I'm good at or like, my family always goes against it. It all started back when I found my talent in drawing back in Kindergarten. I always drew pictures. I still do now. It's so fun and good for the mind. My parents told me it's bad for my health and I should concentrate on other stuff. They always forced me to do other stuff I would hate in the end. Like playing the violin. My mom forced me to play it and I hated it. Later on I played the piano, I thought it was all right until I found a piano book of anime songs and I play some of the songs non stop now and I love playing the piano now. I enjoy playing Single Bed, Tuxedo Mirage, and Dan Dan Kokoro Hikareteku. My family can't stand me playing the piano even though they forced me into it in the first place. The hardest part was when I chose to take Japanese. Everyone in my family thought I couldn't handle it. I really wanted to learn it. So they let me thinking I would fail. But in the end, I caught on and had the highest grade in the class. It made me feel great I had an academic I was great at and was alawys looking foward to learning. And then again, my parents didn't seem to like it.

Learning Japanese and having great artistic ability has brought me many great things. I can do great drawings of anime characters, and learning japanse has brought me to japan for a summer and maybe Sheryl.

Then maybe there is Sheryl. I'm in love with her, but still not going out with her yet. We went out on one date and it was really well. Sheryl still seems interested. But my mother says I shouldn't. She talks about how my aneki got pregneant at my age and it angered me to hear that I would ever do such a thing to her. And then she just mouths off. It made me feel heartbroken to hear from my own mother that she would call a girl I like a slut. Sometimes I wish people would understand me. Especailly my family.

Only the rare people in this world who understand me are Crackpr0n, Suzuki-Sensei, Ms. Levy, Sheryl,my first true love Mai (who I haven't heard from for 2 years), Justina (a girl I regretfully betrayed), Fumie-Chan, and my host family. I talked to my host family this weekend. I told them I'm graduating and starting college soon. They're proud of me. I also told them I'm after a new girlfriend and I wanted it to be Sheryl. They laughed at the idea but still wished me luck. Nothing's really new with them. They're not having a new student for the summer. Suzuki-Sensei now teaches at a different school. He says it's one of the best schools. If I had the chance to tell the school they are lucky to have a great teacher like him. I wish I could see him right now, too.

Well I hope to have some fun and graduate with a positive blast. Just get my diploma (something I dont want because I dont need it because high school doesn't get you shit in life).

But I wish I were in Japan right now. In some situations I'm in right now, I wish I had a family that would listen to me and use trains because of a suspended license.

That's all for now

2002-05-18T07:10:00.000-07:00

Well my mom doesn't have cancer. At least that's a good start to a positive re-start in my life. I guess I can't celebrate my birthday driving on the 24th next month. It would of been awesome. Man, my arms hurt from practicing my para para routines. It's hell sometimes when you feel like a real dancer practicing all the time. Nothing much happening. Doing this dope DNA fan art once again. Also, getting some nasty porn of some asian chicks from Kazaa. That's all I guess.

2002-05-16T15:48:00.000-07:00

All I can say is FUCKING GAY!!! 2 days ago, I get a letter in the mail from the DMV, and they told me my license was suspended until July 1. What's fucking gay is that I have no right to a hearing. First off, I went to court, paid the fine, went to traffic school and all that other gay shit and they told me my license won't be suspended. Guess what I get the letter and it says my license is suspended. What's also fucking gay is that it has been suspended since April 1. So fucking gay. If I got the notice before my parents did, I would of said fuck this shit and thrown the letter away. Since they got to it first, my loss I can't drive until July. Pisses me off. I feel like dosing myself with gamma radiation and turning into a giant green monster and break everyone's face there and yell, HULK SMASH!!!! HULK WANT LICENSE BACK!!!

But anyway, it kind of slows my plans down with Sheryl. I guess I can't go out by myself and buy flowers who i see is the most beautiful girl in the world right now. But I'll still invite her to the graduation party if she can make it. But my parents aren't pissed about the license situation. My friend got his licenese suspended over something 3 years ago and he fought to get it back but costed him $500.

I seriously wanna hire a lawyer and sue for like $3,000,000. $1,000,000 for doing this gay ass shit to me, $1,000,000 for defamation of character, and $1,000,000 for being a bunch of cock suckers. I don't give a shit if it's out of tax payers money. I could probably do well for the state by spending it on personal needs than the govt spending it on stupid shit like alternate fuels.

But anyway, this part of life is gay. I seriously feel liek causing some crazy shit.

School is almost over, yay!

I wish I could of gone to Japan. If I had the money and everything to do so, I would take Sheryl to Japan and make her dreams come true and make her my queen.

2002-05-14T15:49:00.000-07:00

I had a weird dream last night. I had a dream I took Sheryl home, and then we make out on the hood of my car. Man I felt great but too bad it was a fucking dream which pissed me off. Some fag in one of my classes won't leave me alone. Kicking his ass on purpose won't be worth it. Plus, I got graduation next week. Can't do anything stupid now. I got suspended on the last day of school back in teh gay old days of Jr. High. Man I fucking hated it there. I just want to have some shit done asap, get Sheryl to go out with me, and have fun.

2002-05-12T08:47:00.000-07:00

School is almot over and I'm really excited. I'm listening music to my favorite hentai game, True Love. Ah kind of relaxing. I gotta start studying for the finals. I only gotta take my Economics, Englsh, and Math finals. So great. I also finished some cool DNA fan art. I'll post them up later when I bring them home from school. I think it will be the greatest ever. I have no plans for any type of vacation this summer since it's a little limited. But I wanna get to know Sheryl more and have things work out between us if things go they way I planned. I think she's a great girl and I feel that I deserve her. She's kind, beautiful, funny, sweet, and all that mumbo jumbo. Maybe I should put her in a school uniform and loose socks. God she would look dazzling. But she would think I'm a pervert (she probably already does). But I'll get her some roses for graduation and give her the card I made fo her. What do you think?

I've been studying some para para routines now and then. Kind of stuff because my back and shoulders really hurt. But I'll be prepared by the next gathering.

School is almost over. After that, a whole new world and life. I wonder what it will be like?

2002-05-08T21:48:00.000-07:00

Well lots have been happening latley. My parents got into an argument last night. My mom was screaming and yelling at my dad to turn off the TV. And my brother butts in and tries to stop things. My dad goes downstairs and watches TV. Then he keeps accusing her of thinking only of herself. Then my mom talks about how she quit her job to get away from stress. Then my gay ass brother starts crying because he's so fucking paranoid and gullible. My mom keeps on talking to us like she's going to die in a second. I kind of really wanted to laugh because I thought she was somewhat being stupid. So was my brother. I really wanted to laugh my head off when my brother was talking and crying at the same time. They're taking this too far. First off, nobody is going to die. It's not the end of the world, etc. Everybody is still here in one piece. Hey shit happens and there is nothing we can do about it. We gotta accept the way things are. Not try go against it.

Maybe my father was right. When I was emotionally depressed in my life, I only thought of myself and felt like everything should revolve around me. Then again, my mother kind of has some health and emotional issues. But I can understand taking out my dad and shit. She keeps accusing us like we don't care about Darren or any stupid shit like that when we really do. She doesn't pay attention. I mean, she accuses me of being a liar everytime I practice my piano and do my homework when I really do. It's just she wasn't paying attention. I try to get it through her head. But she just yells at me and threatens she will slap me.

I really love my family but my mom and derrick shouldn't be super paranoid about everything.

Well, I graduate in a couple of weeks. I am sure as hell excited. After this, I'm going to fix things up, get ready for college, and get my feelings across with Sheryl. I honestly hope she does like me and is willing to go out with me for reals and be my girlfriend. I hope my mom is willing to accept that. I would never do anything to hurt Sheryl nor would she do anything to hurt me (I hope). Learning from my parents relationship, I have to learn more about my partner first, be willing to be there for her, as she would for me. I honestly don't thing my parents' relationship is working out anymore. But I think they can fix things. They've been married for 20 years. It would be a shame if they seperate or divorce now.

In some ways, my father is right. Because I went through emtional stress once. And the only person you can think about is yourself and you believe no one cares it's just you're not asking or showing it. My mom thinks no one cares but she doesn't ask. I just wanted to laugh at my brother Derrick for being such a gullible pansy. I can understand, but he should learn how to stay out of other people's business.

I'm not trying to take sides here. I am not on my father's side, nor on my mother's side. I just think they should handle it their own way. I was able to solve my own emotional problems my own way. I found an oppurtunity, took it, fought for it, and then rewarded. I went to Japan. It was the happiest time of my life. I never frowned, never yelled at anyone, helped people out, made people laugh, comforted people, made new friends, became a completley different person. Better yet, the person I've always wanted to be. The thing is, I just wish I could go through it again and again. I really loved my host family. I kind of loved them better then my real family. I went out of the house a lot, went to a great school, made new friends, meet specail women, just about everything. It was the only time in my life where I could be myself and have no one feel shame for it. It was great. The only time I cried was when I had to leave. I thought 6 weeks was too short. I wish I did it for a year so I didn't have to go through some of this stupid shit that's going on right now.

People I miss in Japan are my host family, Suzuki-Sensei, my possee in my Japanese school, a little girl named Yui, a little girl named Momo, and Fumie-Chan. I met these people, straightened myself out and I was the happiest person on this planet. But unfourtunatley, all good things come to an end. For me, it was like I died and went to Heaven. But maybe one day within my lifetime, I could relive the happiness I once had and maybe have more fun the next time.

Maybe a new door of happiness is right in front of me with Sheryl. I feel bad for her because she has never been to Japan (and she's Japanese). I told her it's a great expereince, and if I loved it, she would love it more. We pretty much have the same College agenda. We're both hoping to spend a year in college in Japan and maybe we can do that together. I'm a young optomist. My mom told me last night that sometimes things dont go they way you want them to. That's true in some areas, but you never know.

2002-05-06T21:31:00.000-07:00

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target="new">Which Street Fighter are you?
Test by Nathan

pretty much describes me. i use to be involved around in campus, did a lot of shit for awhile for the campus, then became a delinquent and I hate everything. But anyway, school is almost over and I can't wait. It's a good time to start changing. I'll be starting college soon and I feel like it's going to be the greatest time of my life. My only fear is flunking out. Yes, I am still hoping for me and Sheryl. I hope we can have a wonderful friendship which could blossom to a beautiful relationship then evolving to a long lasting marraige.

But anyway, I got my goals essay in economics due friday. i'm hoping to get a job at microtek this summer and make 800 a week just because I can speak Japanese. Right now I'm watching Fist of Legend. One of the rare Jet Li movies I like. I tend not to like his movies because I find them lame, but Fist of Legend was awesome. I also like Nakayama Shinobu in the movie. DAMN SHE'S FOINE!!!

2002-05-05T08:32:00.000-07:00

Hmmmmm. Nothing much happened. Friday I watched the school's end of the year video like 3 times. SO FUCKING GAY AS HELL!!! Wednesday, I got recognized by my school for my trip to Japan. Thursday, don't remember what happened besides having piano lessons that day. And yesterday I got to see the Spider-Man movie. Such a great movie. Best I've seen in my life. I cried when Uncle Ben died. Great coming of age story. If you haven't seen the movie, then you haven't lived life. Maybe I'll ask Sheryl if she's seen it yet, and if not, I'll try and see it with her and hopefully not cry when Uncle Ben dies.

2002-04-30T21:58:00.000-07:00

Played Pump It Up for the first time at the mall. The stage lay out is good for freestyling but a majority of the songs suck ass. I can wonder why So Cal people don't like Kpop. Nothing is new with me latley. Just trying to get Sheryl still, etc. I guess I've been happy off and on these past few days. I found my old diary from a year ago that only lasted a month and a year later I'm doing this. I guess this is just a continuation

the originally one talked about the time how I missed Mai, my love with a friend of mine, and my cute crush on a japanese student teacher. i look back, and i've matured in some ways, and in some ways i haven't. Well I don't know why I posted, I guess just to keep this updated.

2002-04-26T20:52:00.000-07:00

Take the test here!! Made by Jenna and Robbie.

nothing new with me. couldn't go out with sheryl tonight. still go next friday. got post prom with my bro and buddies tommorow. and just painted my room with my mom today. nothing. looks my "anime eyes"

2002-04-26T05:46:00.000-07:00

Well I tried to call Sheryl last night. Wasn't home. Told whoever answered to have her call me after 7 because I was going to have piano in a few minutes after the time i tried to reach out and touch her. She hasn't called yet. I'll call her later today. I badly want to go out with Sheryl since I'm not going to school tonight and we can't go to prom together. I really want to her to be my girlfriend more than anything else right now. It would make me happy. My heart skips a beat everytime I lock my eyes on her, talk to hear, or just hear her voice on the phone.

On the phone, she sounds so sexy. In real life she sounds so cute.

Well enough of Sheryl I guess. I'm taking the day off and help my mom clean the house.

2002-04-22T17:55:00.000-07:00

Nothing really happened yesterday as usual since it was Sunday and I never do anything. Today was just another day. Bought post prom tickets for me and my bro. Gonna play some Bemani all night this Saturday and take the night into my own hands like it's the best night ever. My mom is quitting her job this Thursday. And I'm taking the day off Friday since it's senior ditch day. I'm going to help my mom paint the house since I got nothing better to do. Hoping to rebuild my breaking relationship with my parents somehow. Maybe help them pain the house is a start.

I still want to go out on a date with Sheryl this Friday or Saturday. Maybe go to a movie. Dress nicer this time, drive my mom's car. Maybe I should call her tommorow and see what she wants to do. Well me and my mom got along today. Which is good. But I want her to see my feelings for Sheryl. Or just tell her I'll just hang out with her as friends. That would be nice. Even though I can't go to prom with her, at least we can still have quality time together.

Met a celebrity today from Australia. She's met George Clooney and has been to the playboy mansion. My dream house. My friend Seung Joo Kum doesn't wanna go to prom. But I can understand his feelings. His mom has become a feminazi and shit. Mike (his American name), has been through a lot of shit latley, and he's trying to find a great girl for himself. Like I am. Maybe I should practice on my para para routines for this saturday night. I'm still having trouble with Money Go. I haven't had enough practice with it. Same with Don't Stand So Close, and Burning Desire.

I gotta get a birthday card for my teacher, too. See how that will turn out. Wish me luck with Sheryl and in life in general.

2002-04-20T22:37:00.000-07:00

Went to Golfland today for an hour. Saw the SST people and met KawenaChan the first time. She's pretty cool. We all had fun. I played some PPP. Damian made fun of me when I did Deluxe's Para Para routine. Also played some DDR and IIDX. I'm happy that USgAy mix is not gone. It was great to see all the SST people again after two months.

Now on to Sheryl. She does not want to go to prom with me. But she's still willing to hang out with me. I feel happy still as long as I can make her happy that's ok I guess. We had a great time last night at Freestone Park. She's so cute. When I got home, I was still pooped that she wouldn't go to prom with me. But at least we are still on the right track. I was planning on going to a movie with her next Saturday and for some reason my mom starts yelling at me that I shouldn't date so early. First my mom was happy that I found a great girl and someone to have special time with. Now she's being a bitch about Sheryl. First off I tell her that I'm 2 months away from being 18. She's giving me this stupid shit I should concentrate on my studies. You know what, fuck studying. It's a waste of time in the way my mom defeines it. Then she gives me this shit how my half sister got pregneant at my age blah blah blah.

I then yell at my mom for saying I would ever do that to Sheryl or say Sheryl is like that. From what I can comprehend, my mom thinks Sheryl is a slut. It hurts me to hear that from my mom (even though she did not directly say she was but she sure was implying it in another way). All I want is someone to hold, someone to make laugh, someone to touch, be the person for her to cry on, be her everything. That's all I want to be to Sheryl. Not some sugar daddy.

My mom then slapped me and I went to my room and I started crying. Why my mom just suddenly be like that and say all those bad things about Sheryl. I'm in love with her, I can't change that. I know my mom is unhappy right now but that doesn't mean she has to dictate my life and say I can't be, too. I'm an individual. I'm not like my cry baby younger brother or anything like that. My mom is a brain washer.Overprotective. Because of my mom I'm not that self-reliant on myself.

I've had girls in my past, but I've never really experience true love. I really want it to experience it. I'm a serious person in relationships. The first girl, we were unable to express to each other. The second, we couldn't handle the distance apart anymore. Now I have a stupid obstacle. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom and I'm not a kid anymore. I'm going to have to leave someday and that time is soon. I need a job, I need a girl, and I need to get the hell out of here.

For now, I am going to post prom with my bro and our friends and play PPP, DDR, and II DX into the night away.

2002-04-19T18:47:00.000-07:00

Well just got back home with my date with Sheryl. Doesn't wanna go to prom with me for a bad experience she had at last years. At least we are at a good start. I wanted to pick her up from work. But she brought her own car. We then met at Freestone. Had a nice walk and talk. She's a great girl. But she still isn't sure about herself. But she wanted to go out to dinner at first. I then declined though because I was short on cash (note: bring more cash the next time). I don't feel hurt. At least I can make her laugh and still like me. That's a start. I plan on hanging out again soon. There are girls that like me and I figure out their feelings at the last second. But when I try to express myself, shit always happens. I'm sick of it. Guess I ain't going to prom. At least I am a good start of trying to get a girl.

2002-04-17T22:08:00.000-07:00

Good news. Sheryl called me yesterday. We plan on going out to Freestone Park this Friday night. I hope we have a great date. If things go well, she'll go to prom with me. She kind of did feel uncomfortable of asking her out so quick and we only knew each other for like a few minutes or so. But it didn't bother me. At least she's still willing to go out on a date with me (as friends) and as willing to get to know me. At least she was happy with the letter and all. What makes me happy so far is that I can make her laugh her head off. At least thats a sign. At least I got to let her know I'm a nice guy. I'm so happy and nervous about this day. I gotta clean my car Friday since it's a half day at school I got all the time to prepare for our first date together. At least I hope for a peck on the cheek.

She sounded so sexy on the phone saying let's go out on a date and see how things go from there and have some fun. It made my heart pound like crazy and it still does. I can't wait for Friday to come. I don't know if we should go as friends and I try to pull some moves on her or we just pull the moves on each other. She works at In-N-Out Burger. I plan on picking her up and giving her a ride in my car (hope she likes BMWs). I still don't know what to wear. I'm more excited about the day I met Fumie. I pray to god things turn out for the best. I hope we have a relationship that will last forever.

2002-04-15T18:50:00.000-07:00

Somewhat of a shitty day. Two tests today and another test tommorow. Reading a new book in English, and just doodling in my classes as usual. Once again my quest for Sheryl's heart is delayed. Well shit happens. My friend couldn't find the attendance lady but he said he will try again tommorow. I hope she doesn't have a boyfriend or a date to prom. I pray to the Good Lord that she doesn't. I seriously want (maybe need) a girlfriend by graduation. Especailly Sheryl because we could be in the same classes in college when we start in the fall. I really just want to get to know her. That's what a nice guy like me wants to do. I went to the mall today. Nothing specail happened. Got my graduation present yesterday. A new computer. Get to use it next month but we don't know where to put it. How fucking shitty. Plus the current monitor I am using right now is a complete piece of shit. Mike spent the night at my house Saturday night. Nothing specail happened as usual. Just got a chance to hang out with him like we've hardly been doing for a few weeks. But I want us to rebuild a better friendship. It's not that we have problems, it's just we don't see each other that often anymore even though we've known each other for 6 years. Weird, huh? ggpo

2002-04-13T07:16:00.000-07:00

Well, my friend couldn't get the letter and balloons sent to Sheryl. But he had an understandable reason. I requested him to send the balloons to her last class because I didn't want her to be holding them all day and cause stress. We learned she has 3 classes. And I will have them sent to her on her 3rd hour on Monday. We could of done this sooner but we didn't really expect this to happen. Guess I'll wait on Monday. At least I had a good dream about her. All we did was hold each other.

2002-04-10T20:03:00.000-07:00

Well these past two nights, I've been having weird dreams. Two nights ago, I've had a dream where I met Sheryl in Chandler Fashion Square Mall. I reminded her we met at the orientation and I forgot to ask her number. She then told me she doesn't talk to the likes for me for no reason she said. Her parents then appeared behind me (I dont know what her parents look like), and said it's best I stay away from her. I then ran off and for some reason I show up at my grandma's house and my brothers, my half sister, niec, and my cousin are outside. I go inside for a second and then come out and everyone is knocked out and my niec is kidnapped. We then search for her and I decided to rest and sleep off. I then assume I woken up from a nightmare. I then get grabbed in the wrist and then I'm stabbed to death and I woke up for reals this time. It scared the shit out of me. I talked to my cousin and this is what he had to say.

For the Sheryl part, he says that I'm afraid of rejection by her. And her parents are also could be part of it. That I'm afraid my planned actions of getting together with her will fail. To be honest with you all, I am. I only met the girl once or twice and I'm already serious about her. For my niec being kidnapped, it's probably about a hate for her or something like that. I can't stand her, but I don't neccisarly hate her. For being stabbed to death, I want to die but still fear it. And that is somewhat true with what's been happening. I want to die, but I know I got a life to live.

Last night I dreamed that me, my brothers, my father, my friends, and my brothers friends all went out to McDonalds. And the McDonalds had a DDR 4th Mix machine. I played on it and some kids were asking for quarters and I told them I didn't have anything. While I was playing, the pick pocketed me and I chased after them and slapped them down. Then their brother shows up who is my age and I kick his ass. My dad told me to let it slide. He then takes the kid and throws him through the window like hell. He's still sick like he was yesterday. Then the kids dad shows up and my dad kicks his ass. He slams his thread through a table and snaps the dude's neck military style. It was the shit. Plus, my dad knows that shit in real life, too. Then it's a month later in my dream and me and my dad go out shopping for a car. I chose a red Trueno AE86 Sprinter 4 speed. My dad keeps on going off at me saying I can't drive stick shift. I never drove the car in my dream but wanted to. It felt so real it was awesome. I then woke up feeling dissapointed beacuse my dream was awesome.

Well my best friend Mike showed up at my house today. His old Camaro he bought is pretty cool. Gave me a ride in it. It freaked the hell out of whenever he shifted gears. It felt like he was going so fast. I gave him the letter to give to Sheryl and gave him 5 dollars to make sure she gets the letter on Friday. I can't believe what I'm doing but I hope it will be worth it in the end. My cousin can't believe I'm serious about Sheryl even though I don't know about her. But I'm still willing to try.